Saw the guys took another night off last night. Can you blame them? I suspect they all wanted to rush home early and catch the debate, or maybe they were weighed down by the thought that it was the eve of 9/11.
Who's to say? Beautiful, pre-fall evening, great weather, full house of fans to play before, a pennant race churning...who could get inspired by THAT?
Anyway, some of you may be old enough to remember this, from National Lampoon:
It became a classic (and now I've probably screwed myself with our mysterious blog censors forever. Oh, well.)
Anyway, I was reminded of this while trying to deduce how the Mets could have acquired, just this year, an entire battery that your New York Yankees could very much use. Not only is Luis Severino, now the Queens Team's top starter, but their back-up catcher, one Luis Torrens.
Who is this Mr. Torrens in our Tale of Two Luis? The Yanks originally signed him out of Venezuela as a 17-year-old, back in 2013. He started to climb his way up the Yankees' farm system, but was plucked away by Cincinnati under the dreaded, Rule V draft in 2016.
After that, it's been the usual roller coaster ride for baseball lifers. Torrens suffered a couple of major injuries (one of them in a benches-clearing brawl), and bounced in and out of the major leagues. Finally, at the start of this season, he ended up...back with us.
There he was, down in Scranton, hitting .279 with five homers by the end of May, when we sent him off to...the Mets.
Well, must've been a helluva deal, no?
No. Except for Hal Steinbrenner.
The Yankees actually SOLD Torrens to the Metsies, for an undisclosed amount of cash. And over in Queens, the (still 28-year-old) Luis has excelled. Three homers and eight doubles in just 105 at-bats, .732 OBP. Best of all, though, is his play in the field. He has thrown out 65 percent of all attempted stealers (the NL average is 21 percent). The Mets TV guys kvell about his defense whenever he plays.
Hey, but we have Trevino the Framer!
Really, this is the living end. Hal Steinbrenner needed MORE money??? While we are not permitted to know the amount he got for Torrens, it cannot have been anything very large. Put another nickel on the already extortionate charge for rat dogs, you big nepo doofus, and keep a valuable back-up catcher!
It is much harder, of course, to blame Hal & Pal for giving up on Setback Sevvy (Though why he was given a large, multi-year contract when already hurt escapes me. Probably escapes Pal, too.)
But again, even through his many years of comebacks and declines, the Yankees could never decide, Okay, time to cut our losses and just trade the guy, if only for the usual magic beans. Same with the other Luis.
The bottom line with Hal Steinbrenner, as ever, is the bottom line. This idiot probably picks up pennies from the sidewalk. He seems so desperate for money he should be on that "I need cash now" commercial. He...
Aww, never mind. Just please don't shoot the damned dog.
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4 comments:
Yes - I remember that cover :)
Perhaps HAL can star in a new series of new commercials for the Money Store.
Or better still, maybe he can create his own brand of cryptocurrency called Nepo-Coin and launch a commercial campaign starring that adorable team of blathering booth buddies, Kay and Paulie.
The great years of the Lampoon. As opposed to the last 15 years of the Yankees.
Why would anyone sell a player for cash? It makes no sense to me.
I can see selling a player for cash if you were the Boston Braves, but a minor league in 2024? When you're the Yankees? Did the Ghosts of Wilpons Past Present and Future visit Hal and CashBrain all in one night?
Fuck this whole organization.
I "think" the Yankees got $100K for Torrens, which might have been enough for another portrait of Hal and his polo horse...
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