Sunday, August 31, 2008

Yanks Successfully Complete Latest False Dodge

NEW YORK _ Noting that summer doesn't officially end until Sept. 21, and that the final days of Yankee Stadium deserve nothing less than the greatest comeback in the history of sports, the Yankees Sunday postponed their dramatic final charge to defend the 2007 Wild Card crown until a later, unspecified date.

"It's just too early," team president Randy Levine told reporters, after ordering his troops earlier in the day to give a tough victory to Toronto. "If we start hitting and fielding now, hell, we could be 10 games ahead by Oct. 2, and where's the made-for-TV movie in that?"

Yankee savior Sunday was Robinson Cano, who miraculously turned a doubleplay ball into a Blue Jay rally, insuring that the surge would not start prematurely.

Today, the Yanks plan to lose to Roy Halladay, further improving their chances for the greatest comeback in history. But Levine cautioned reporters about assuming the wild card drive will start next week.

"Think about this," he said. "What if a team were mathematically eliminated -- and still managed to win! Wouldn't that be unbelieveable? Wouldn't that make a movie? I mean, woah! I'd like to see the Boston Red Sox faces after we come back from a 10-game deficit with only four games to go. Would that be great! I mean, woah! Hey, let's do another dooby. I mean, woah."

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