Friday, July 3, 2009

An Open Letter to Eric Hinske

Dear Madam or Sir,

Prove us wrong.

We are not happy with the trade that made you a Yankee. Nothing personal. Not your fault. Rest assured, we will root for you. Get a big base hit, win the World Series, and we'll take everything back.

But, sir, you symbolize a problem with the organization, and it worries us.

We do not need to get older. We're old enough, thank you.

Before you arrived, there was a kid named Ramiro Pena. He played well, gave everything he had. Often, he served as a late inning replacement for Jeter -- actually, he was defensive improvement -- and he stole bases as a pinch runner. Now he's in Scranton, and if there anything that says "So long sucker" in Yankee language, it's "You're going to Scranton for a short time!" Ask Shelley Duncan. Ask Edwar Ramirez. Ask Kei Igawa. Ask any of them. A ticket to Scranton is like being fired from a cannon to shake rain from an empty cloud. Big bang, and you're forgotten.

The team does not need to get slower. We are slow enough, thank you.

Pena stole bases. Another kid, Francisco Cervelli, beat out infield hits. Say goodbye to Cervelli. He's going to Scranton, and Jose Molina will take his place. Good man, Molina. Slow as brain cancer.

So, as for you... get some big hits. Field thirdbase. You're not in Pittsburgh anymore.

Prove us wrong. We will welcome you. Until then...

Everywhere else in baseball, young and fast is preferred over old and slow. Only here. And that worries us.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Pure Poetry!

As I watch and awefull Johnny Damon and Nick Swisher play like doo doo today.

Dennis Tampa

fan said...

Dear IIH

We appreciate your love for the great game of baseball, and your kind words regarding the dazzling speed and flashing brilliance of Ramiro Pena and his kid sized glove.

It has, however, come to our attention that in order to steal a base, one must first get on base, a task that has proven very difficult for the aforementioned Pena. It might also be worth mentioning that Mr Hinskie is capable of hitting some 20 long balls a year, whereas Mr Pena and his fun loving gritty bat might never hit a single one.

I wish to further add, that Mr Jose Molina is one the foremost defensive catchers in all of baseball, and his lack of speed in comparison to Mr Pretty eyes Cervelli is negligible.

Fear not, Your beloved youngsters will have a role to play on your beloved team, yet Molina and Hinskie give the Yanks the best chance to win.

Sincerely,

He who wishes the Yankees to, umm actually win

Curious Alph said...

Dear fan,

Why not wish for wheels, then , and become a bus?

We all wish for the Yanees to win. And for riches. And eternal life with beautiful young damsels.

But wishing blinds people to the strategies, tactics, and decisions which are needed to succeed.

Just a minor point, but Pena was out hitting the also seldom used Hinske with a batting an average of .270 vs. .255.

And Cervelli is hitting close to .300 while Molina was looking up at .250 when he pulled his quad muscle lumbering toward first.

Understand,I always was grateful the Yankees were able to re-sign Molina as back-up to Jorge. I was pretty certain he was going to retire.

But they are both old, slow players.

And the Yankees have never won a thing with teams of only long-term, plodding veterans.

Now, we have one guy with speed.

And he is a singles hitter, as well.

Deez Nuts said...

A. Eric Hinske is not slow (mentally or physically).
B. Hinske had 10 stolen bases last year in 380 plus at bats. Your so called speed demon Ramiro "Ricky Henderson" Pena has 3 in 86 at bats this year. If he was to get the same amount of at bats as Eric did last year that would come out to around 12 stolen bases. Two more that Eric...man this guy is really a blazer! I heard on ESPN radio yesterday that they are thinking about changing SB for stolen bases to RP for you know who!
C. Eric likes to steal all four bases at a time with the long ball...your boy Pena has hit a grand total of 3 in 4 years of professional baseball.
D. Pena is so fast! He once stole 8 bases (career high!!!!) in a single season (minor leagues!!!)
E. Next time you post some more crap like this...you might want to do a bit of research....I just saw a flash go right by my head...It was black, white and blurry. It looked very much like a speeding bullet. Oh...it was just Ramiro Pena out for an afternoon walk.

el duque said...

Deez,

I hope you're right. I really do. But Pena is fast, much faster than Hinske. Just look at the two.

Hinske 380 at bats don't count the number of walks he draws -- a good thing for Hinske. He does get on base. But if you're really trying to argue that Hinske is faster or as fast as Pena, c'mon, man.

And who is going to spell Jeet at short? Right now, it's Cody Ransom. I just don't think adding an extra hitter is worth losing the backup glove and the speed.

But I do hope Hinske does well for us. So does Alph. Believe me: I've seen the man suffer too much. He is the baseball version of a battered wife.

Anonymous said...

These guys are just idiots. They know nothing about baseball. BA is the last way you judge a player. Hinskie is a far more productive player than Pena will ever be.

Ramiro freaking Pena? Once again stupid Yankees fans overrate crappy minor leaguers.

BTW, without Damon, this team would have problems.

suck on that Dennis.