Wednesday, August 26, 2009

If election day were today, would you vote for Joba starting in the playoffs?

Game I: Sabathia v. Lackey

Game II: Burnett v. Weaver

Game III: TBA v TBA

Game four: Sabathia v Lackey...

For the record, I've no quarrel with Dave Eilland's work. But it seems as though we have no clue WTF goes on inside Joba Chamberlain's size 14 head. Over the all-star break, our nipple ringed leviathan goes home to the meth lab, plays Wii, eats macaroni and cheese, and then returns as Victor Zambrano. Everything hunky dory.

Then, as soon as we start penciling him in as a win, he reverts to the 4-inning, 102-pitch, Stephen King directed movie bomb (Think "Maximum Overdrive.")

So what does Eilland do? What anybody would do. He orchestrates a virtual all-star break, gives our boy 10 days off to wander the shopping malls and download porn, like any other self-respecting 23-year-old demon child of the corn. Makes perfect sense.

What happens? "Maximum Overdrive," starring Chris Farley.

Right now, we have no fourth starter. Right now, we have no fifth starter. We win those games by scoring 10 runs. Last night, we scored nine. Wasn't enough.

What we do have, though, is a plump, juicy, six-game lead, three veteran starters and a relatively decent bullpen. And come Monday, we can unleash the hordes of Scranton -- everybody from Edwar, to Alba, to Melancon -- everybody.

But somebody's gotta figure this out. Way I see it, the Small Market Sox are about to receive a huge influx of pitchers. And where the hell goeth Phil Hughes?

3 comments:

Joe said...

eff the rest...let the kid pitch on normal days start. too much rest (and no beer/no tv) make joba something something.

SUPERFRANKENSTEIN said...

Every time Joba gets it together, his mom gets arrested and he goes down the tubes again. The Yankees need to hire her a minder, like the Nationals did for Elijah Dukes.

Anonymous said...

It has to be Andy.
Joba has been too shaky.

Go with the Pettitte, the one who has been better lately and the one who has playoff experience.