1. We win the World Series in seven over Joe's Dodgers. (Duh.)
2. Jeter named MVP; Tex in second.
3. Small Market Sox miss playoffs after Papelbon blows 2-run lead.
4. John Sterling breaks 9-second WinWarble barrier.
5. Michael Jackson's deranged killer, Paul McCartney, brought to justice.
6. All 103 MLB steroid users -- including members of Small Market Sox -- publicly revealed.
7. Carl Pavano pulls hammy. (NOTE: We do not wish arm trouble on any pitcher; a twanging hammy will suffice.)
8. In final game, NY fans give Hideki Matsui the "PAUL O'NEILL!" treatment.
9. Kate Hudson & Minka Kelly overcome differences, unite to work for world peace.
10. Republicans & Democrats, inspired by Kate Hudson & Minka Kelly, overcome differences, unite for world death panels.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
10 events that would make this the greatest season in history
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6 comments:
Eh...for event number 4, the Master is gonna have to pull out like a 11-12 second warble for it to be the greatest season in history, especially if you keep counting his PEWs-performance enhancing warbles. He'll brake that barrier it if we win the World Series or even ALCS because (if I can remember correctly) he says the words not the acronym.
The Yankees win the world series and it is a lock that thuh voice breaks the 12 second mark.
ballgame over,
world series over,
Yankees championship season over,
It won't make it into the hall though.
A new amendment to the list:
Billy Wagner, in his first appearance against the Yankees, comes into the game at Fenway Park with Enter Sandman blasting from the PA system and proceeds to let up back-to-back and a-belly-to-belly home runs to Tex and A-Rod, giving the Yankees the lead. And Mariano strikes out the side to get the save.
Ghost,
It would be at the stadium.
Otherwise, excellent scenario.
It would be nice if Yankees fans appreciated Matsui and gave him an O'Neill-esque sendoff.
The difference, of course, is that Matsui is not a complete asshole. His biggest flaw is the porn addiction.
I thought we had one more series up there with them? Oh well, there's always next year.
New Scenario #11: Billy Wagner becomes the second coming of Eric Gagne.
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