Sunday, August 16, 2009

Yanks 22-6 since Pope broke wrist, but the cast will soon come off

Obviously, his Excellency was praying against us. And praying hard.

Oh, yes, they'll deny this. Bet the house bippy on that. They'll claim the Pope never takes sides in a sporting event. They've even claimed he doesn't need his wrist to pray!

Do they think we're stupid? Do they think us blind, unable to see? Do they think we cannot do the math?

Since taking over in April 2005, a few months after Boston's championship stunned predecessor Pope Paul into his death spiral, this has been a Redsock pope. We cannot imagine what role Benedict's wrists played in engineering Boston's 2004 World Series victory, but we certainly do know this:

We've won nothing -- nothing -- with this guy in God's Oval Office.

And since July 17 -- when he apparently was clapping too hard for a Big Papi single and felt something snap -- we have gone 22 and 6, while his team of Pedroiaphiles have stumbled and mumbled into the Wild Card race.

Oh, sure, they'll claim it's coincidence. Bah. They want us to lower our guard, because the cast comes off any day now. They said he'd only wear it a month. He'll be rehabbing in Pawtucket -- (hm-mm, PAW-tucket?) -- and then what? A few ump calls going their way? Maybe the winds start blowing in when Arod comes to bat?

We have only a few more days of the Pope unable to swing his bat.

The month of September still looms. Don't get cocky, Yankiverse.

Wait a minute: A holy hamstring, maybe?

4 comments:

Man Ram said...

Hey! Who took me down from your page? I liked being immortalized in the monster on the right hand side of your page. I demand an explanation!

el duque said...

Don't blame me. I'm frightened of that side of the page.

dadlak said...

There's been another Pope sighting.

Please see http://myteamrivals.typepad.com/nationalpastime/2009/05/at-long-last-2009-world-series-game-three.html

A Protestant Response said...

To counter this Papal support of the Red Socks, I have started selling the infamous, "Pope
On A Rope " soap for individual or team use in the bathroom shower.

First used in the locker rooms of various Dioces in the Boston area, this Pope Soap built a reputation for sin and depravity amongst the flock followers.

The statues of morality for this site do not permit details of the type of depravity referenced, but let it simply be said that the then Pope banned and ex-communicated all Pope Soap ( as well as all "cleansed " victims of said soap) from enclosed showering facilities throughout the Wards, Parishes and Dioces of the greater Boston area ( down as far as Hartford, Ct. I am told).

Luckily, I located a dealer on E-Bay from Asia who had a boxcar load of Pope-On-A-Rope soap.

I have stalls selling this product at every Yankee game, and will continue to do so now that the Pope's wrist is ready and able to resume its normal functions. Look for us outside the "Call For " ticket windows.

He can still beat us through biased and bigoted prayer, like he did yesterday, but we nailed him in Texas.