Taking Alphonso's advice, I'm on a grueling scouting mission

Since I felt guilty having Alphonso do all our advance scouting work in the South Mexican Dirt League, I have undertaken a scouting mission of my own, scouring the beaches of the East Coast searching for the next great arm. I believe Andrew Brackman was discovered this way.

If the next great arm is only, say, 14, then we can simple have him shipped to Latin America, have him lie and say he's 16 and sign him for several million dollars -- taking, of course, a generous "consulting fee." Bud Selig has assured us that he's OK with that.

I'd get into more details, but the sun is hot and the Utica Club is cold. Yes, the grueling work of scouting calls.

-- BBB