Yankeetorial: As enticing as they may be, the Yankiverse should still not institute Death Panels

To the Yankiverse,

When ex-governess Sarah Palin recently raised the horrific issue of death panels in American society, Yankee fans everywhere had the same basic reaction:

Death panels? Yeah!

Of course, they were intoxicated with the notion of swift and permanent judgment for the Cody Ransom who fails to replace the A-Rod, for the Sergio Mitre who doesn't fill in for, um, whoever was the fifth starter. And, hey, an old-fashioned necktie death panel for the next Raul Mondesi does indeed make for a 20-minute pleasureable fantasy - if that's what you're in to.

Well, we at IT IS HIGH are NOT into pleasurable 20-minute fantasies, and we are swayed not only by Ms. Palin's hair but her moral code, and we say,

WHAT DO WE WANT: NO DEATH PANELS FOR THE YANKIVERSE!

WHEN DON'T WE WANT THEM: NOW.

The reason: Who needs death panels when we have Scranton-Wilkes Barre.

(Think Damaso Marte.)

In fact, if the Obama Administration is seeking an alternative to death panels, we suggest one simple solution.

Scranton-Wilkes Barre.

Your granny no longer a useful cog in society? Gramps can't remember your name?

Scranton-Wilkes Barre!

Every American child deserves an opportunity to live a happy life. And how about if they do it in a great American city, a town once immortalized in a Harry Chapin song!

Summing up: DEATH PANELS? No.

SCRANTON-WILKES BARRE? Yes.

Next up: Yankee Teabagging... a danger for our children?