10 Reasons Jeet Will Stay with Yankees

1. On other teams, he'll have to run for Captain.

2. Owns winter home in Tampa.

3. Would have to change logo on checks.

4. Doesn't want to have to memorize new zip code.

5. Currently lives near good take-out deli.

6. Would have to reconfigure car to new AM stations.

7. John Sterling's suicide on his hands.

8. Doesn't want to watch Eduardo Nunez break his hitting records.

9. Would lose chances with Kirsten Gillibrand.

10. How do we say it? Eighty million greenies, simolians, dee-dongs, manoogas, blondcatchers... Reggies.