Sunday, March 10, 2024

It's a good thing that these games don't count, because the Yankees just keep losing

 

The best way to tell the story of yesterday's masterful loss is through the indigenous Yankee oral tradition. 

The defeat actually began many moons ago, when runway model Nestor Cortes discovered a bold new fashion statement: the denim baseball cleats. This stitch of artistry should someday go into the Hall of Fame next to Bill Veeck's dwarf's jersey and Bud Selig's promotional base logos for Spider-Man 2.

Sashaying with the shoes, Nestor unleashed his inner Kardashian. One problem, though: 

They seemed to flap on his feet. 

Thus, the experiment was canceled.

In the game, Nestor shone even less brightly - nine hits and six runs - though it must be noted that the long, wind-aided triple that ended Nestor's day, should have been caught. His numbers wouldn't look so bad.

That Nestor's ERA now stands at 8.10 remains one of the vagaries of March baseball, especially when your rotation looks thinner than your starter.

Look, I'm not going to mention Blake Snell and/or Jordan Montgomery, though I feel compelled to note that Montgomery deserves better than having the Yankees - the team that forsook him - now joining a league-wide collusion. Does anyone not think he would help this team? Will the Yankees only wake up when one of our starters clutches his elbow and walks off the field, as if his shoes are flapping? 

The Yankees are now 5-9 on this spring. They have lost five in a row. They find new and creative ways to lose. Only the Rays, Guardians, White Sox and Mariners have worse records. 

If any of this mattered, they would be already eliminated from the spring training  race. Fortunately, in the words of Freddie Mercury, nothing really matters, nothing really matters... to me...

14 comments:

JM said...

We've lost seven out of eight!!! FIRE THE MANAGER!!!!

Or at least sign another starter. Nestor and Rodon are not going to turn things around from last season. Sad but true. It might be good to just go ahead and put them on the 7,152-day IL before the season starts. I'm sure Cole, Stroman and Schmidt can pitch more often, like Walter Johnson or Cy Young used to. And always go nine innings. At least.

Doug K. said...

Since we live in a world where conspiracy theories seem to get a lot of traction...

MAYBE Nestor and Rodon are DELIBERATLY pitching badly so the YANKEES WILL BE FORCED to go get their friend Monty. Once he is signed they will both return to being LIGHTS OUT!!!!!!!!!

BTR999 said...

I don’t get too jacked about ST games one way or the other. But a general impression so far is that our depth pieces and lower minor leaguers aren’t as good as what I see on other teams. The problems of poor player development, bad coaching , inadequate medical care, and over reliance on analytics remain.

edb said...

We will have to cut the Yankees some slack. H O W E V E R, just how many holes do the Yankees have? The offense thus far, looks lame.

TheWinWarblist said...

Every day should have a full throated call to FIRE THE MANAGER!!!

And the GM.

HoraceClarke66 said...

As BTR999 stated in the last post, the coaching and training staffs have once again ravaged the roster. Ridiculous that a young player like Peraza has such a severe injury to start the season. The team is—I know this will shock everybody, but hang on—incompetently run.

There. I said it. For the first time.

HoraceClarke66 said...

On the free agents, I remember being very disappointed in Winfield...which was ridiculous. On my part.

Winfield was an excellent to superb player throughout his Yankee years, hitting as high as .340, and as many as 37 homers (despite being a righty in YS II), played a great outfield, and stole as many as 19 bases.

No, he never had a Reggie moment (or postseason), but mostly he was betrayed by the inability of the Yanks' front office to put a championship team around him. The Yanks had not only Winfield, but also Rickey and Mattingly in the 1980s...but somehow could never come up with enough pitching or infielders, while foolishly trading away people like Fred McGriff and Willie McGee.

Sound familiar?

AboveAverage said...

This is going to be difficult to believe but I have no choice but to share it here, first, before others find out about it elsewhere . . .

Here we go:

Clarke Schmidt was hammered in the first inning of today's game.

There - - - I said it.

(and he wasn't even wearing those denim cleats like Nestor did yesterday)

As BTR999 stated in this post - I too don't get too jacked about ST games one way or another. But, since these Yankee pitchers are already in mid-season form, I say - BRING IT ON!


HoraceClarke66 said...

Also, Billy Martin did untold damage to Catfish's arm long before 1977.

Hunter threw an incredible 328 innings in 1975—and would've won 30 games with decent support. But the Yanks were out of it after they lost a DH to Boston on July 27th and fell 10 back. Nonetheless, Martin let Hunter pitch 12 complete games AFTER that. Useless.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Frank Drebin assured me there is nothing to see here. Move along.

ranger_lp said...

Our beloved Master would always say that you never give credence to exhibition games…

acrilly said...

The worst thing a ball player could be called is a ST Allstar, these games literally mean nothing. However, this team’s more likely outcome is mediocrity after the duct tape falls off than playoff glory. I have an unsettling feeling we’ll be looking at a AAAA outfield by June backed by a AAA rotation. It won’t matter how many times Volpe strikes out.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Winfield gains points for getting mad George hogtied, but loses them for having my memory of him being GIDP and the ridiculous 'game winning rbi' stat that seemed manufactured just for him.

Publius said...

Schmidt got bombed in the first...4 runs, two outs...was lifted, then returned in the second and pitched a little bit better. I choose to be encouraged.