Bud Selig, architect of Yankee post-season three-man rotation, agrees that six-weeks playoff schedule is too long

Bud Selig is on to something, and you know what that means.

Baseball's $14.5 million hairpiece is cutting the fat out of next year's playoff schedule!

Don't worry, though. Nobody's talking about starting games at a reasonable hour, so kids can watch. At least one round will appear on cable, featuring ads for liquor and male-enhancements. (Still holding the line on cigarettes! attaboy!) And the final games will be played under a chance of flurries.

But as of next October, the three-man playoff rotation is history.

That means... more than ever,

The Yankees need to SIGN JOHN LACKEY.

IF WE SIGN JOHN LACKEY, WE WILL WIN THE 2010 WORLD CHAMPIONSHIP. DO YOU UNDERSTAND? BLINK, IF YOU UNDERSTAND!

YES, IT WOULD BE NICE TO TRADE FOR ROY HALLADAY! BUT THEY'LL WANT AN ARM AND LEG. SIGN LACKEY. KEEP JOBA. KEEP HUGHES. KEEP JESUS. JESUS, KEEP JESUS! KEEP IAN. SIGN LACKEY!