Our President will be probed by Bud Selig for an off-hand comment in today's introduction of Jacoby Ellsbury as the Yankees' new ambassador to Massachusetts. President Levine said the Yankees would give a 10-year contract to Mike Trout, if they ever get the chance. That's tampering. And now, President Levine may have to pay the price.
Hold on, folks... I know you're upset... Try to keep it together... Just the thought of losing our President... it hurts... Never have I imagined the world without the Randy Levine red curls shouting, "I know Derek Jeter" Now... we might lose him? How will we survive? All is lost. ALL IS LOST.
But... if he must be banned, so be it. When Bud Selig probes you, he probes you. If anyone has dirt on Randy, I know for a fact that MLB has a bank account for just such purchases.
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As much as the Milwaukee Moptop loves the Yankees, I'm sure this'll be no big deal at all. Nothing to worry about, captain! Steady as she goes!
...And yeah, I mean only one REAL career loss. That thing with the tugboat, and that deal with the HMS Hawke? Shit; those coulda happened to anybody.
Kuhn nailed me for this when I tried it with Nettles. Fair is fair. Fry him!
(Oh, and I never thought it was just a random coincidence that Kuhn's initials were BK. But we play hopscotch and midnight-bowl together every week now, so don't take that as rabble-rousing, okay? It's just an observation. A little added value if you will. I've always claimed to be about that. Why change?)
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