MEMO TO TAMPA

TO: BRAINTRUST
FROM: IIH, IIF, IIc...

Thanks for the pens. It's a bit distracting, the way her dress comes off when you turn the point upside down, but great laughs!

A few thoughts...

1. The saddest part of this collapse has been watching Melky Cabrera, one of the great baseball names in history -- MEL-KEE-CA-BRERRR-UH -- maybe hit a career-ending impasse at age 24. Pitchers figured him out. He's never adjusted. The guy brought us great joy these last two years. It really hurts to see him in Scranton.

2. We should immediately stop the Carl Pavano rehabilitation project. We do not owe him a free audition for his next team's contract. That's all he's doing: Trying to wheedle another contract, a al Sterling Hitchcock. Nor does Pavano deserve to be fed to the wolves, considering the Ed Whitson-like treatment he'd receive. The guy got hurt. Not his fault. Cut the ties. Sooner the better.

3. It's time to rethink the hubris of our annual draft. We seem to think that because the Yanks draft a kid, he'll drop everything and sign. Gerrit Cole made it clear that he planned to go to college. Other teams took the hint. Not us. Last year, teams avoided Andrew Brackman because it was clear he'd need surgery. We drafted him. We still don't know if we've gotten anything -- but he's a year older, still fragile, and a lot of prospects have bypassed him.

Think about this: On our biggest draft payout this year will be about $860,000. The KC Royals spent more on their pick. The Redsocks, Angels, Mets, et al -- they landed first-rounders. We signed a risky, dart shot named Bleich. That sums it up. The strongest part of our farm system seems to be its p.r. office.

4. We should see if Giambi or Abreu clear waivers, and if they do, we should trade them. It doesn't matter what we get. We can see if Juan Miranda (1b-Scranton) is for real. We can try Shelley Duncan, or Brett Gardner, or Austin Jackson.

5. We should shut down Joba, or put him back on a really tight pitchcount.

6. We should bring up Igawa, Kennedy and Hughes, and turn them loose. Now. After Sept. 1, add Jason Jones, Chase Wright, and a few others. Put everything we have into the games featuring Andy and Moose (Cy Young, 20-wins?)

7. We should encourage Hideki Matsui to do the surgery on his leg. Now.

8. As the final games wind down, we should concentrate on great Yankee legacies, returning championship teams, whatever it takes to shift focus on this debacle. Cut our losses. Try to appear graceful. Try not to eat each other or blame each other.

That won't be easy, with guys like Alphonso blogging. We'd try to buy him off, but we know his unquenchable zeal for the truth cannot be corrupted. Let's just hope he goes easy on us. We don't know what he knows, but it's clearly far more than we do.