Thursday, October 13, 2016

I could live with Indians v. Cubs, but Jays v. Dodgers might be in our best interests

An Indians fan once asked, what is my second team? I asked WTF? He explained how Clevelandonians have been so relentlessly beaten over the centuries that the fans often picked a second team, one that might actually win something. I said he should choose the Yankees. (This was 1999; I'd never make that suggestion now.) He became testy, turned a bit potty-mouthed and said the Yankees are his 29th team, and so the conversation turned to UFOs and shape-shifting lizard aliens. (After all, this was a Cleveland fan.)

Being the nice guy that I am - and also wishing to thank the Clevelandites for gutting the Redsock Nation before Columbus Day, I find myself nearly designating Chief Wahoo's tribe as my second team. Likewise, I'm sort of rooting for the Cubs because a victory would end this stupid "Curse" crapola, once and for all. If the Cubs win, Chicago will go crazy, scores will be killed, buildings will fall into the lake, and the very next day, everybody will wake up with their cars needing the same brake job as before, and they'll slowly realize that all pro sports championships are elitist-based fraudulent lies, and that they will soon be forced to watch meaningless seasons of a repugnant, soul-less, mercenary-empowered game that nobody - certainly not me, DEFINITELY NOT ME - gives one flying, hamstrung hoot about. Fuck dat.

But... here's a thought:

If Toronto wins the big golden turd, it will up the price tag on Edwin Encarnacion, the free agent slugger most likely to become an evil Redsock this winter. It will tie up more of John Henry's money. Right now, Boston fans will tell you over and over, again and again, and then over and again - how incredibly smart they are - how they have $28 million coming off the books due to Papi's retirement, and that Encaracion will fit their lineup like a condom, and how with Moncada, a full year of Benentendi and Encaracion, they will be even better in 2017. And damn, they might be right. (I don't foresee the Yankees chasing Encarnacion, unless they scrap their entire youth movement. We're much more likely to chase a closer.)

So here's the deal: If Toronto wins, their billionaire owner will feel more pressure to keep Encarnacion, and his price will rise. Boston might have to give him a seven year deal, which will eventually haunt them. If Toronto wins, Boston will pay more... or walk away.

Likewise, a Washington world championship would probably up the price on our Bryce Harper, who grew up wanting to play for the Yankees. Cashman seems to be streamlining our payroll structure to coincide with Harper's 2020 free agency. Frankly, I hope we don't tie up our entire franchise onto one player - it has a whiff of Rickie Henderson II - but if Harper is tired of losing in Washington, he might want to join the Yankees, who should be on the rise around 2019. Wouldn't it be nice to have Harper in an outfield with Aaron Judge and Clint Frazier (assuming they both turn out as we hope?)

Best scenario: Jays v. Dodgers. Or am I missing something?

11 comments:

Local Bargain Jerk said...

Best scenario: Jays v. Dodgers. Or am I missing something?


Your logic seems sound, but I would personally get a kick out of watching the team assembled by a former Red Sox GM ... and who left in a huff ... battle it out with the team managed by a former Red Sox manager ... who left in a huff.

Regardless who wins, we Yankee fans win because some content-starved announcer, looking to fill air time, will connect those Red Sox dots about Epstein vs. Francona and will go on and on about it. Seeing Boston's nose rubbed in their own past pee stains would be groovy.

As an added bonus, if Cleveland is in it, viewers would have the pleasure of watching Terry Francona and Joe Maddon manage using their heads, experience, and instincts vs. a large binder with a protective vinyl cover and multi-color tabs. If by chance Joe Girardi tuned in for even one broadcast, we Yankee fans would again win.

Finally, I would like to see the Cubs win it all. Unlike us, they still have a great ballpark. If even one announcer brought this up during the Series, and Hal Steinbrenner happened to be watching, well, we Yankee fans would win again.

It's hell fighting for table scraps, but that's where we Yankee fans find ourselves these days.

el duque said...

An addition: Best thing that could happen might be for Aroldis Chapman to blow a critical game 7 lead, thus sealing his exit from Chicago. That way, we might get him for A SECOND DISCOUNT! That's right... TWICE AT REDUCED PRICES!

Anonymous said...

THE TEAM THAT IS PLAYING "MEAN", WITH A CHIP ON THEIR SHOULDER, IS THE TORONTO BLUE JAYS....... I THINK THEY WIN THE WORLD SERIES THIS YEAR....... I DON'T LIKE THE JAYS WITH ALL THE PRICKS THEY HAVE ON THEIR TEAM (DONALDSON, BAUTISTA, AND STROMAN)....BUT AS LONG AS THE METS, AND RED SOX ARE DEAD, I AM IN XANADU.

Local Bargain Jerk said...


AS LONG AS THE METS AND RED SOX ARE DEAD, I AM IN XANADU.

This belongs on a T-Shirt.

The Sayonara Kid said...

What are we talking about here? I thought the Railriders already won it all.

The Sayonara Kid said...

Unrelated, but this is the eerily appropriate wikipedia definition of "riding the rail":

Riding the rail (also called being "run out of town on a rail") was a punishment most prevalent in the United States in the 18th and 19th centuries in which an offender was made to straddle a fence rail held on the shoulders of two or more bearers. The victim was then paraded around town or taken to the city limits and dumped by the roadside.

Being ridden on a rail was typically a form of extrajudicial punishment administered by a mob, sometimes in connection with tarring and feathering,[1] intended to show community displeasure with the offender so they either conformed their behavior to the mob's demands or left the community.

Alphonso said...

Does anyone really believe the Washington Nationals can win anything? I mean, they have one classy future Yankee player (although he might suck if he has to play clean-shaven); one "out of this world " pitcher who can never pitch in big games because he is always hurt ; and an over achieving Mets' castoff who has amassed a number of timely hits against the Dodgers.

And we all know that Washington DC deserves nothing good, for the crap they do for this country.

I'm Bill White said...

I wanted to be an astronaut when I was a kid. No way Harper goes to NY.

KD said...

The "Nats" will never win a WS in our lifetimes. They are cursed ever since they sat Strasburg in the post season because he "used up" all his innings during the regular season. They sacrificed their post season to "save" their ace. Ended up under the knife anyway. Stupidest decision I ever saw until Buck's recent boner.

Anonymous said...

YOU ARE RIGHT KD....

John M said...

I don't think Buck has actually ever had a boner.