Tuesday, August 13, 2019

An incredible day of juju, tomato sauce and friends.

First, I want to thank the IT IS HIGH commentators, lurkers, stalkers, friends, hangers-on and street people who yesterday turned Yankee Stadium section 431 into a Juju hurricane - opening and slurping the canned tomatoes that were once the Baltimore Orioles - and giving me one of the greatest days of my life as a Yankee fan.

Let me tell you something: I always figured that anybody who followed this ridiculous blog had to be a total loser. I mean, who else would do that? Yesterday, I met much of the community of incredible people - artists, writers, businessmen, titans of industry, beekeepers! (actually, no, that's a joke) - who for reasons of mental health love the Yankees and take celebration or solace in the daily postings and comments on this blog. 

I believe that, long ago, something happened to each of us - good or bad, I dunno - but it left us needing each other in times of personal great joy or despair, which is, of course, determined by the outcome of the Yankee game. 

I don't have the words to thank you all for organizing and attending yesterday's get-together. I'm much more comfortable discussing why Clint Frazier needs a second chance. In fact, let me do just that: Clint needs that second chance because everybody in our delirious group got one - when we found the lodestone of Mickey and Roger, Reggie and Thurman, Derek and Mo, and John and Suzyn. There, we found a safe haven in which to share our ups and downs. So, yeah... for better or worse, I say Red Thunder needs the same. BRING HIM UP, CASHMAN!

Listen: If the Yankees don't win the 2019 World Series, this entire season will have been a long, relentless drain of hope and creativity. But dammit, no matter what happens, we will face it together.

It may not read this way, but right now, I'm choosing my words very carefully: I have been blessed with a great wife, family and a life far better than I deserved. But in a weird, impossible-to-explain way, this blog gives me as much joy as anything else. 

While watching or listening to Yankee games, there are moments that cause me to leap from my seat and scream joyfully with all my might. 

In life, there are not many things that can have such an impact. 

So... in the name of tweaked gonads and Colter Bean... I thank you all for joining me on this long and twisted road to the 28th World Championship. Yesterday, we won two... and the games seemed like mere dreams. There was no way the Yankees were going to lose with that Juju volcano up in the left field nose-bleeds. But GODDAMMOT, WE BETTER WIN TODAY. IF WE LOSE TODAY, WE'RE FUCKING DEAD!

33 comments:

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...


As someone who lives in the middle of Virginia, I could not make it to NYC for 8/12. I am sorry (for myself) that I missed it.

Let's deal with "if we don't win the World Series, it all sucks."

1 - I was brought up believing 3 things: A. the U.S. was the greatest country in the world. b. Jesus Christ was God. c. The New York Yankees would win the World Series every year, and if they didn't, there was no World Series (i.e., it was Fake News). I still believe in (c).

2 - with or without a W.S. championship in 2019, there already have been numerous astonishing joy-producing moments. I including Mike T, Gleyber, DJM, and Gio in there. And the very idea of winning without any starting pitching of note is on a level above "astonishing" -- ain't it? Also, Gardy seems to have cured his 2nd-half--is-adisaster syndrome; didn't expect that, didja?

3 -- I've always hated the Orioles. This in part comes from the 1969 World Series (in which they lost to the freaking Mets) and also living close to Bawlmore (as a wage slave working in the D.C. area from 1979 to 2014). So what's happened this year feels like someone has found my ice cream and slathered it in chocolate sauce, then put in a call to Heidi Klum and had her delivered to my front door (also covered in chocolate sauce!).

4 -- Think about all of those injuries. Think about how Judge is playing since he came back (mediocre, except for the walks). Think about the fact that they don't even update Encarnacion's rehab status anywhere (I saw an article about what Ellsbury is doing the other day, but nothing on EE). The NYYs have the best record in baseball - yes, tied with LAD - despite all of this. And don't forget: No starting pitching, no Sevvy, no Betances.

5 -- Let your mind wander to the fact that Cashman did not destroy whatever future there is for this team in the minors at the trade deadline. What did we all expect? Some kind of idiotic move for a horrible pitcher (or three). Didn't happen. I'm pretty happy about that.

Therefore: We might not win the W.S., or even get in. But it's been a pretty great season already. Let's celebrate that . . . and keep in mind that we might even get a World Series Championship (complete with Heidi in each of our laps) to boot!!!!

TheWinWarblist said...

Joe FoB? TMI!

FYH.

Ceeja said...

Sorry I couldn't make it, I'm a thousand miles away. But what a great couple of games to listen to. Can never quit this team, even if trump bought them.

My brother has the NY on his headstone. That tells you all you need to know

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Duque,

Your sharp eye from the Uecker seats, helping the ump make those ball and strike calls, was inspiring. The "Lavelle School dropout" crack was a little over the top, though.

You are right about being blessed, as are we all. Unless the Yankees lose today.

TheWinWarblist said...

Mmmm ... chocolate sauce and Heidi ... but definitely chocolate sauce!

TheWinWarblist said...

Oh, and Larry? Lest you think I've forgotten, fuck you too.

Urban Farmer formerly known as DutchFan said...

Haves vs haves not
Elite Vs deplorables
Disciples vs flock
Field of Dreams vs couch
Balls vs strikes
Hotdogs vs kale
Joy vs life

Lately my appetite for the US has eroded. It doesn't seem that great anymore. Like it might fall apart.

That won't happen I know. But it seems a little lost.

One of the things I love most is the cultural, even philosophical meaning of baseball in its everyday life.
That is why I watched Field of Dreams yesterday before game 1.
That is a big reason I always read this blog first thing in the afternoon.

Yesterday I would have loved to be in New York.

But even 3000 odd miles away it felt like fun.

Urban Farmer formerly known as DutchFan said...

On a lighter note. OMG.

Trump: 'Terrific' that former MLB pitcher Curt Schilling is mulling a congressional run

https://thehill.com/homenews/administration/457207-trump-terrific-that-former-mlb-pitcher-curt-schilling-is-mulling-a

President Trump on Tuesday embraced the idea of former Boston Red Sox pitcher Curt Schilling running for Congress in Arizona."Curt Schilling, a great pitcher and patriot, is considering a run for Congress in Arizon...

-- News+

Scottish Yankee fan said...

How I wish I could have made it to meet up with the good folks from here and see my beloved Yankees play

Unfortunetly I have 3000 odd miles and the Atlantic Ocean between me and the ballpark

Glad everyone had a good time

You know I am not a happy person my life is very tough but despite all the hardship stress and depression my love for basbeball remains with me

Im glad I found this website Im very grateful that the regular posters have been so kind and friendly with me and put up with my daft questions and my continual call up Mike Ford posts

So thank you all very much and I hope we can all celebrate 28 this season

John
Glasgow,Scotland

Local Bargain Jerk said...


John (Scottish Yankee Fan):

My mother's family was of Scottish descent. Her parents (my grandparents) were both born there. They hailed from Paisley.

Whenever I did or asked for something particularly dumb as a boy, my mother would say "What? Are you daft?"

I now know as an adult that when my mother opened her mouth, out came her own mother's words from when she did something particularly dumb or objectionable as a young girl.

Thanks for the memory.

13bit said...

One of the best days I have had in a long time. Nothing like a gathering of the tribes from the far corners of the Yankiverse.

We will try to coordinate it earlier next year so that our international tribe members can think about attending.

Thanks, Duque, for building our lifeboat - or leaky barge, if you will - and for coming downstate.

And forget about beekeepers, I had not idea how many contributors to this blog were porn stars...

Carl J. Weitz said...

Amen, 13 Bit. A really wonderful day indeed and really too short. You and LBJ did a great job setting everything up.

Perhaps next year we can do a Friday evening or a Saturday day game. Or perhaps a short road trip to, say, Camden Yards where we can either do a short drive or hop a relaxing Amtrak or a shuttle. Someone on the Metro North RR said he met his cousin from Baltimore at the game and that they were so desperate for cash attendees that they had special promotion games where they gave away one free ticket for every paid twelve and under paying kid-no limit! So you can bet we could get very good seats at a steep discount with volume.

ranger_lp said...

Ditto to 13Bit & LBJ...felt like kids to a summer camp trip...lol.

Parson Tom said...

Precisely this:


It may not read this way, but right now, I'm choosing my words very carefully: I have been blessed with a great wife, family and a life far better than I deserved. But in a weird, impossible-to-explain way, this blog gives me as much joy as anything else.

Parson Tom said...

Hey, did charming Mr Anonymous show up?

Ken of Brooklyn said...

It was a tremendous day of getting to know you camaraderie, inside jokes and a shared mutual admiration for both this Yankees team, AND, for our beloved IIHIIFIIC blog! It was a blast to put faces to the names of the luminaries on this site, I am always in awe of what you ALL write and your brilliant contributions, and your kindness and generosity of spirit made the day even more special for me.

And 'Second Master' Hart, you literally have the biggest heart which shows in every aspect of this site, but, it especially shines in person. It was pure joy to listen, share information, and shoot the breeze with you. If it's true that the fish rots from the head down, then it's ALSO true for the opposite! Your supernova energy, genuine curiosity and kindness radiates all the way down through this site, and we are ALL truly blessed to have this connection!

Many thanks to everyone that I met yesterday,,,, I'm already looking forward to the next time we can all get together!

LONG LIVE THE MASTER>>> IIHIIFIIC FOREVER!

Carl J. Weitz said...

Urban Dutch Farmer....Curt has no chance in hell in winning any senatorial or congressional race anywhere. Especially in Arizona which is very close to being blue if it isn't already.
All any primary opponent has to do is constantly mention three words: Rhode Island Scam and he's finished. Not to mention his lack of expertise or even basic knowledge.

On you're other comment. You might enjoy this short clip from The Newsroom that ran for several years, recently, on HBO.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvlmOIbC7fU

JM said...

Scottish Fan, I hope you were able to make it to one of the London games, financially taxing as I'm sure it must have been. I also hope things get better for you in some way, shape, or form that adds happiness to your life in the land of lochs and whiskies. You're always welcome here, I know that.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Hear, hear!

El Duque, there is always much palaver about the "communities" we find online these days. But you have actually built one, which is indeed a rare and noble feat.

This will go down as a terrific Yankees season even if they ended up ousted in the Bud Selig Memorial Wild-Card Play-In game. (Well, all right, it will go down as a terrific Yankees season even if they are beaten in the ALDS by the Tampa Bay Baseball Anonymous group.)

In that way, it is much like every other Yankees season, for those who know how to enjoy them. In which, no matter how great or how justified the crazed, constant carping over the idiocy of HAL, Coops, and the other Lords of the Game—in which I yield to no man! (Or to The Warbler.)—the company cannot be beat.

To my pals on the "It Is High..." Team!

HoraceClarke66 said...

And yes, many, many thanks to 13bit and LBJ for putting this all together.

Urban Farmer formerly known as DutchFan said...

Thank you Mr Weitz.
Never seen that one.
How contemporary.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Mr. Warmth, aka stat douche, was nowhere to be found. The pizza pit phone rang busy all day.

Coincidentally, I heard the police outside the stadium before the game wrestling someone to the ground who was shouting "check his weighted BABIP+" or some other nonsense in some obscure millennial language.

Anonymous said...

TOTALLY HEARTWARMING TO KNOW HOW WELL THE DAY WENT.

THE MAGIC OF THE GET TOGETHER BROUGHT HOME 2 WINS TOO.

DON'T FORGET EVEN THOUGH BALTIMORE IS ATROCIOUS, WE LOST A LOAD OF GAMES TO THEM LAST YEAR.

KEEP THE FOCUS.

WE NEED HOME FIELD.

WE NEED THE METS TO GO DOWN IN THEIR HOUSE OF HORRORS IN ATLANTA.

BOSTON IS JUST ABOUT DONE.

WE NEED ALL OUR ENEMIES "SMOKED".

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Final thoughts on the day. Was good to meet for pregame social. The entire day fealt like a wedding reception where you never have enough time to talk to everyone. Love you guys and girls, but not that way. More in a Mongo kinda way.

Alphonso said...

Next year in Marienbad.

I'll come in from LA next year, the god's permitting.

I think I saw Duque on TV....was he wearing Yankee garb and walking with a beer? On stairs?

It was special, I can tell.

But some of us have acts to perform.

Ken of Brooklyn said...

@ Rufus, AaaaaaaMEN Brother!

@ Hoss, exactly! >>>>THANK YOU 13Bit and LBJ for your time and effort in arranging this inaugural affair, very well done my friends!!!!

Lieber said...

Lieber loved it. Thanks to all.

Mustang said...

Sorry I couldn't be there, and I'm glad you all had such a great day. Sounds like I really missed something. Next year!

HoraceClarke66 said...

I think The Warbler dancing on the bar and flashing some thong was the highlight. But there were so many...

HoraceClarke66 said...

You're right, ALL-CAPS, we went only 12-7 against Baltimore in 2018. But that was when they still had Buck, playing every game against us like it was the World Series.

Boston now 3-12 in their last 15. The fat lady is clearing her throat, but I'm still not willing to wave her onstage until they tank a little more...

Anonymous said...

Alphonso,

Yes in the 7th inning. I don't really know what he looks like. (I know you do) but the guy had a VERY El Duque feel. When I saw it I said, "I'll bet that's El Duque." If anyone has MLB they can bring that game up and take a look.

Doug K.

Anonymous said...

The only down note: I'm dismayed to see that the self-appointed Hall Monitors of the blog--the ever-pious Parson Tom and JM--uttered not one syllable of reproach about Dufus J. Caliban's unprovoked, compulsive spews of venom in an otherwise joyous thread. I call attention to their uncharacteristic lack of vigilance only to underscore two key points: I am NOT the initiator of most of the acrimony on this blog, and the sanctimonious blather directed to me from the usual sermonizers would be better directed to others, who not only fail to find fault with the most noxious aggressors but by their silence cheer them on.

But it's not really about concern for comity--it's about ensuring that only the approved tribe members have the right to be unhinged assholes, as long as the target is not a tribe member. That's the ethos of racists, bigots, and parochial pseudo-moralists the world over, the tenor of our Trumpian times. Isn't it reassuing to know that this blog is a proud exemplar of that diseased zeitgeist, to the extent that it's just fine to make sick jokes about a man shot at a bar and within a fraction of an inch of death just because he wore another baseball uniform.

The interlocking NY is your swastika. You gather to cheer at your Nuremberg rallies. You revel in the triumph of the strong over the weak, of the will over gentleness. You would all do well to ponder these words from William Carlos Williams:

The crowd at the ball game

BY WILLIAM CARLOS WILLIAMS

The crowd at the ball game
is moved uniformly

by a spirit of uselessness
which delights them—

all the exciting detail
of the chase

and the escape, the error
the flash of genius—

all to no end save beauty
the eternal—

So in detail they, the crowd,
are beautiful

for this
to be warned against

saluted and defied—
It is alive, venomous

it smiles grimly
its words cut—

The flashy female with her
mother, gets it—

The Jew gets it straight— it
is deadly, terrifying—

It is the Inquisition, the
Revolution

It is beauty itself
that lives

day by day in them
idly—

This is
the power of their faces

It is summer, it is the solstice
the crowd is

cheering, the crowd is laughing
in detail

permanently, seriously
without thought

Puckered's sample size said...

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I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™

I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™

I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™

I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™

I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™

I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™

I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™

I just got off of my shift at The Pizza Pit. Mommy had a sandwich waiting for me in my basement apartment and I ate it. Then I picked my zits and changed out of my cool orange and red uniform. After I attempted to sooth my onanism, I decided the world should know of the depth of my baseball knowledge. I insult everyone, but claim I’m the one being picked on. I’m Stat Boy!®™, and the world should pay for me being such a loser!
I’m Stat Boy!®™


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