Saturday, May 6, 2023

Continued: The Wreck of the Cashmund Fitzgerald

 Philosophical question: Which is worse? 

1. The blowout loss, where everything goes Rudy Giuliani  early on, and you can switch to a movie or professional cornhole? 

2. The late-inning nail-biter, which we should have won but for a botched fly or rotten umps? You watch to the miserable end, then click it off before the final pop-up lands. 

I say No. 3 - All of the Above. 

And the juju haunted '23 Yankees - now 10 out in the AL East - are masters of the craft.

It's still pre-Mothers Day. Still too early for pro cornhole. But how bad is it?

1. Really bad. They're saying Carlos Rodon might miss June. They're refusing to put a timeline on his barking back. They're giving him an epidural to help through childbirth. 

2. Really, really bad. Luis Severino was going to start a rehab assignment this weekend. They delayed it, filling the air with happy talk. A setback, from Setback Sevy?

3. Really, really, really bad. When Oswaldo Cabrera comes to bat, opposing infielders shout, "LET'S GET TWO!" He still has the smile, but everything he hits stays on the ground. (Of course, he still beats Hicks, but what does it matter?)

4. Really, really, really, really bad. Boston has won seven straight. (We don't play them until mid-June.)

5.  Really x5 bad: What does it say when the hope is Willie Calhoun? 

Today, the fulcrum point, the biggest game of the season for Domingo German. Was the Cleveland game an aberration? We better hope not. 

We're 0-1 in the seven game series against Tampa. We must win at least four. It's getting late, early. Really. 

Emily Litella corner: What's all this I hear about Michael King being coronated Yankee closer?

Nevermind.

9 comments:

Kevin said...

Weasels rip my flesh.

Jaraxle said...

Last night Boone had Ikf pinch hit for Bauers, a guy that’s only here because of his bat. If shit like that doesn’t get Boone fired I don’t see any reason to keep watching

BTR999 said...

“It's a sad sad situation…
And it's getting more and more absurd”

DickAllen said...

Rodon's back is bothering him? Adios, Carlos! Enjoy the $162MM!


If we're going to see the last of Cornhole Cashman, the Yankees must remain in the basement and we need to see lots more empty seats from the centerfield camera. The swells won't be showing up in the Bronx to see BaBooooone's rendition of Basement Bertha.

HoraceClarke66 said...

IKF can do anything! I saw him fly the other day! It's true! And he has six-inch long, razor-sharp teeth, and a tail!

The Hammer of God said...

@ Hoss, Would that were true!

@ Duque, I thought the same thing about the blowout losses and blown close games! Posted on Doug's thread and then saw yours! We're on the same wavelength!

The worst kind of close game to lose is the one where Buffoone BaBoone takes a big lead into the late innings and pisses it all away, then proceeds to lose in extra innings. That one is coming soon, to a theater near you! I've seen that movie before loads of times, and I'm sick and tired of it.

The Hammer of God said...

The Carlos Rodon debacle: What the hell is the point of medical exams and going through medical records when you can't even find a fucking chronic back problem? Wow! Another Trashman masterpiece! This one is looking like it's going to be worse than Carl Pavano. Which brings me to another thought, maybe we should never, ever sign a free agent pitcher named Carl or Carlos?

Doug K. said...

"Which brings me to another thought, maybe we should never, ever sign a free agent pitcher named Carl or Carlos?"

Good idea.

edb said...

You git it, Duque. The Yankees and the way they operate smells of the worst bullshit.