I had a conversation with a slimy, mealy-mouthed Redsock fan yesterday, and they're running scared, but they're still clinging to the notion...

... that they are God's chosen tribe of oppressed innocents, which is sort of like Lady Gaga complaining about paparazzi while hiking through an airport in her sparkler bra.

Now, I understand why folks hate Yank fans -- we're obnoxious, eat too much, don't flush toilets, and we complain whenever we lose -- OK, book us, Dano! -- but you can NOT ever say we run around crying about being oppressed. Nope. We know we got it good, we know the system's gamed, we pays our money and we just wanna winna frickin ballgame, OK, thankyou ma-am. We don't poormouth. We don't want people feeling sorry for us. We don't ask for folks to donate canned food.

We don't claim we've suffered and, thus, deserve for God to grant us a win.

Now, these Bozos... Ohhh, we have suffered. Ohhh, if only we could have respite in this lifetime of pain! You Yankee fans... you buy pennants...

Yep. Within 30 seconds, it always gets there.

Here's what you say:

BUY PENNANTS? YOU BOUGHT BIG PAPI. YOU BOUGHT JD DREW. YOU BOUGHT DICE K. THROUGH SALARY DUMPS, YOU BOUGHT BAY, YOU BOUGHT LOWELL, YOU BOUGHT BECKETT, YOU BOUGHT WAGNER, YOU BOUGHT GONZALEZ, YOU BOUGHT SMOLTZ, BALDELLI AND PENNY, BUT SINCE THEY FIZZLED, YOU ERASED THEM FROM HISTORY LIKE TROTSKY IN RUSSIA.

FOR TWENTY YEARS, YOU MARKETED YOUR TEAM BY HATING THE YANKEES. YOU BECAME THE MOST HATEFUL FRANCHISE IN SPORTS. NOW, YOU'VE HAD THE MOST SUCCESS OF ANY TEAM IN THE LAST FIVE YEARS, AND YOU'RE PRETENDING IT DIDN'T HAPPEN, BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO FACE UP TO WHAT YOU'VE BECOME! PAIN? I'LL SHOW YOU PAIN! HOW ABOUT A PEN-JAB TO THE EYE! HA! THAT HURT?

Sorry. Don't do the pen. Got carried away. It's playoffs.