Friday, November 20, 2020

Is this a cruel joke? "Yankees closer Aroldis Chapman’s suspension for throwing near the head of Tampa Bay’s Mike Brosseau was reduced from three games to two after he appealed the decision."

Big Yankee victory, yesterday...

As stated upstairs, the lords of baseball have reduced by a whopping 33 percent their 2021 suspension of Aroldis Chapman - aka "the Water Cannon" - for throwing at the Tampa Rays. 

The Yankee who has engineered more bad endings than M. Night Shyamalan - two walk-off bombs in two years - will now miss the first two games of 2021, rather than three.

Excuse me, but it's hard to contain my jubilation. I'm shaking. My fingers on the keyboard are twitching with joy. How should we celebrate? Quarter-sticks? Boat flotilla? Conga line in the streets? I'm struggling to summon the proper words. Let me try:

Whoop. Tee. Do.

Over the last three years, nobody more than El Chapo has epitomized the Death Barge's unfulfilled erections. To Reds fans, he's the guy who reset the modern radar gun from 95 to 102. To Cubs fans, he's the man who closed their first World Series in 108 years. To us, he's the nightmare before Christmas. He's the roadside bomb behind iconic HRs from Rafael Devers, Jose Altuve and that Devil Ray whose name will always need a spell check. He's a walking case of PTSD. 

I'm sorry, but throughout 2020, every one-run lead brought the lingering terror that the bad El Chapo would stride in from the bullpen. At any moment, he was capable of imploding. 

In the recent post-season, he pitched in three games - a win, a loss and a save - giving up only one run. But it was a doozy. In October of 2019, he pitched in five games - a loss and two saves - and gave up only one run. But, yeah, it was a doozy.

Okay, a little context here: Aroldis Chapman is hardly the biggest "MEH" facing the 2021 Yankees. We've got bigger frozen haddock to fry. But I can't shake it: The mere sight of this guy fills me with dread. No lead ever feels secure. If he walks the leadoff man, ka-boom. Also, it's distressing to watch him sweat. It looks as if he just took the Ice Bucket Challenge. (Wait... yesterday, did Rudy launch the first Shoe Polish Bucket Challenge!) We have him for two more years. Two more years. He's a power pitcher. What are the odds that he'll get better? 

A lot of great Yankee closers - from Dave Righetti to Lindy McDaniel (R.I.P.) - never won in October. For whatever it's worth, El Chapo is fifth on the all-time Yankee list of saves, behind Mariano, Righetti, Goose and Sparky; he will likely pass the latter pair, maybe as early as this year.  

So, three games reduced to two. Really lessons the sting of 2020, eh?

8 comments:

JM said...

At this point, calling Chapman a "closer" is as ironic a joke as a relief pitcher called Holder.

Retired Stratman said...

Or a relief pitcher named Balfour.

TheWinWarblist said...

I'm gonna lose it ...

Alphonso said...

And there are probably 30 closers with more heat, better command and less perspiration.

He has become, "just another Chap in the crowd."

Boring and unreliable.

A wild card closer.

smurfy said...

I woulda stuck on Dave Robertson. Hope he hasn't worn out, good old fireman.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Aroldis is the Yankees winner of the Armando Benitez Lifetime Achievement Award.

He is unique. NO Yankee closer—or any pitcher, period—has failed so consistently in such big moments, without ever bringing home the big prize.

Sure, everyone blows a big game every now and then—even The Great One (Although I still maintain that, if properly used by Joe Torre, his only black mark would have been that Sandy Alomar, Jr., opposite-field, dying quail over the right field fence.)

But even the authors of the most famous flops in Yankees history have usually redeemed themselves somehow, some way.

Sure, Bill Terry let up Mazeroski's home run. But he got Willie McCovey to finish a complete-game, 1-0 victory in Game 7 of the 1962 World Series.

The Goose, still foolishly trying to blow one past George Brett, finished us off in the 1980 ALCS. But there was still the Game of Death in Fenway in 1978, and his good work in the playoffs that year.

Sparky had his tumbles—though never in a vital postseason game, where he was a remarkable 3-0 with a save and a 1.69 ERA in 13 appearances.

But El Chapo? When was his big game? Even in the regular season?

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