Brian McCann? Are you kidding me? This is the free agent that's going to turn around the Yankees?

Listen: It would be nice to have a catcher who hits 20 HRs. We know this, because two years ago, we had one: Russell Martin. Remember him? We let him walk. Too pricy. We went 2013 using a career backup catcher and a Job Corps trainee. And we paid the price. We don't want to do it again. I get that.

But lately, the Yankiverse seems to be advancing the idea that we should get excited about our big possible free agent pickup this winter: Brian McCann, the 29 year old Atlanta catcher. We'd probably give him a five-year-deal, and we'd surrender our first-round draft pick - this at a time when MLB rules make draft picks paramount to a team's long term success.

Do they think we are stupid? This is the guy for which we would dump the future?

Not a bad catcher. And 20 HRs would be nice. But if Tex, A-Rod, Cano and Jeter don't return, will 20 HRs matter next year? And look at the workload: For the last four years, the number of games has declined. He's now likely to catch less than 100 games. Are those the numbers that justify signing this guy? Because we know the Iron Rule of the Yankees: If you pay a guy a lot of money, he HAS TO PLAY.

So - if McCann drops to - say - 17 HR and .240, is he our DH? Because the Redsocks' DH is 30 and .310. Do we need another DH who bats 7th?

What happens after two years, when we have him for three more? This is a catcher entering the breakdown phase of his career. Does he move to first? By then, I suppose we will have traded Austin Romine and maybe JR Murphy? Do we want another Austin Jackson out there? Because Romine improved greatly last season. He might have been the only Yankee rookie with a future. JR Murphy made great strides. So now, they would be trade bait? And would we be trading at the height of their value? Or would it be simply to clear them out?

Listen: This would be the kind of signing Pittsburgh made over the last 15 years. (Lyle Overbay, Jason Bay, etc.) Yeah, it would be nice to have a catcher who hits 20 HRs. But Cervelli, if we stick with him, could hit 6 to 10. And Romine could do 5. That's 11-15. So the grand total of this huge free agent deal would be - what - five HRs?

Is this what will turn around the Yankees in 2014? Dear God, we are so screwed. Soylent Green is people, everybody! Soylent Green is people!