There is no greater abomination in sports than the NFL Pro Bowl.
The players don't care. The owners don't care. The fans don't care. The network announcers pretend to care, but not too hard... or they'll lose credibility. So what can the League do?
Play the game via Madden Football.
Give each star a joystick and a rumble-pack console,
and let the teams play in a bar.
Script the game like pro wrestling.
Have the teams go shirtless,
"battering" each other on every play.
Nobody gets hurt, except for in the fourth quarter
when they break out the staple gun.
Ditch football; let them bowl.