Yankeetorial: At last, I understand the Hinske trade

(How to Beat a Dead Horse, Continued)

Last night, John -- after noting that it is a beautful town with wonderful people and a fantastic ballpark -- basically said Pittsburgh is such a baseball dump that it makes Gitmo look like Six Flags Over Hershey. He said it was heartwarming to see the look on Eric Hinske's face, now that he is a Yankee.

Today, we hear from the Hinsk himself: "I missed the American League, I missed the way games are played here. ... It's awesome to be back."

OK, now I get it.

Hinske has some incurable disease, he's dying, and the Yanks have achieved an act of supreme kindness. This is George's version of the Make-a-Wish Foundation.

Sorry, folks. Maybe I'm wrong. (Been wrong before; I predicted Cyndi Lauper would outlast Madonna.) But once Molina's tired body claims to be ready, we'll send back to the coal mines not only Ramiro Pena but Francisco Cervelli. We're the portrait of Dorian Gray.

Older, slower, clunkier, with fewer game options.

You can say Pena and Cervelli need seasoning. But they sure didn't play like unseasoned rookies. Truthfully, did Cervelli look overwhelmed when he homered against the Mets, maybe turning our entire season around?

I understand the loyalty to Molina. You don't lose your job through an injury. I just don't get Hinske. Like I said... hope I'm wrong.

But one last tirade... for all the media brown-nosers who parrot the claim that we gave up nothing of value, just two 23-year-olds, to get such a grizzled vet as Hinske.

We gave up Ramon Ramirez for Sean Chacon. The syncopaths shouted, no loss!

We gave up Damaso Marte for Enrique Wilson. A steal! they said.

We gave up Marcus Thames for Reuben Sierra. Hooray! they brownnosed.

Jose Contraras, D'Angelo Jimenez, Al Leiter... I won't even mention the guy with the weird haircut we sent for Ken Phelps.

Last year's deal with Pittsburgh -- we got Nady and Marte, Judge Crater and Amelia Earhart -- looks increasingly like the only successful trade the Pirates have pulled off in this millenium.

The day we trade a nobody, the reporter, announcer or blogger who claims we gave up nothing of value should be nominated for Yankee Employee of the Month. Because they're on the payroll.