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Friday, September 25, 2015

When Refsnyder plays, the Yankee "baseball minds" must collectively hold their breaths and hope he doesn't hit

Last night, 24-year-old Rob Refsnyder - the Higgs boson of the Yankiverse - started his first game at 2B since July 18. He lashed a single off of Chris Sale, a known Yankee killer, and you couldn't help but imagine Joe Girardi thinking, "Aw, phooey!"

The reason, of course, is that - on or around July 19 - some Oracle at Delhi within the Yankee brain trust ruled that Refsnyder could not play 2B, or that he didn't bow and scrape, or that he had bad breath, or something equally pertinent, so the guy needed another 50 days at the Scranton Gitmo Motor Lodge Inn. Thus, the Evil Empire went two more months of waiting for Godot - I mean Stephen Drew - to figure out that defensive over-shifts had transformed him into an offensive eunuch. Drew never did adjust. He just lashes balls into reconfigured defenses, and once a month hits 2 HRs in a game. Since July 18, the Yankees have 18 times - (eighteen times, I looked it up , and that's 1/3 of their games!) - scored less than three runs. It wasn't pitching that caused us to fall into second place. It was the fact that in one of every three games, our offense simply disappeared - the way Rob Refsnyder did.

Now, here's where we - as bootless and unhorsed Yankee fans - are obligated to bow and scrape to the Oracles: I mean, what do we know? We are mere fans. We are scum. We have no right to voice an opinion. We sit in the cheap seats. All we do is follow the team with our hearts - and then judge the team by its success or failure. And the overwhelming narrative of the 2015 season is supposed to be: We're excited! The team did better than expected! The Yankees are making the post-season! Right?

Wrong.

I want this to be clear. Because it will be a defining point on this web site.

THE ONE GAME WILD CARD IS NOT THE POST-SEASON. 

WE ONLY REACH THE POST-SEASON IF WE WIN THE ONE GAME WILD CARD.

Remember that. I will fight to the death over that point. You can kill me, but you cannot kill the truth: WE ONLY REACH THE POST-SEASON IF WE WIN THE ONE GAME WILD CARD.

So last night, Refsnyder singles off of Chris Sale, and every Yankee fan is captivity - like me, like you, like all of us - just as Girardi is thinking, "Huh?" - we're sitting in our trailers, clipping our toenails and saying - very nicely and politely to our mothers' mummified corpses: "GIRARDI, YOU BASTARD! WHY THE HELL DIDN'T WE BRING THIS GUY UP AND PLAY HIM? HE DOESN'T HAVE TO FIELD IN THE LATE INNINGS! THAT'S WHAT DEFENSIVE REPLACEMENTS ARE FOR! WTF! THERE'S 10 GAMES LEFT, AND WHY THE HELL DIDN'T WE USE THIS GUY?"

Oh, phooey. Soon, it won't matter. Soon, we'll either be in the post-season, or not. Next winter, the Yankees will probably trade Refsnyder. (BTW: He hit .271 at Scranton, despite going into a huge slump after being demoted) for another David Carpenter. Probably, we'll obtain some Howie Kendricks type - a 2B-version of Chase Headley - and lash ourselves to him - like Ahab to the whale - for four years. That's the Oracle's way.

Oh well, all we need to do is win 10 straight. Behind Rob Refsnyder, maybe? If not, phooey.

13 comments:

JM said...

This Refsnyder bullshit is the worst case of Yankee moronity since we signed half our lineup of limping louts to long-term contracts. In other words, it hasn't been that long, but it really stings.

Thank God for Tex. If he hadn't broken his own shin, we wouldn't have seen any rookies in a field position.

That Tex is a great guy. Makes funny videos, breaks his own shin...and he gets 500 million a year to do it. Wish I could get that job. I suppose if I could hit the curve into the right field seats with regularity it might help.

Tom said...

Ref got renditioned to the Scranton Gitmo Motor Lodge.

The Oracles are Cheney and Rumsfeld.

Tommy Dee said...

Joe McCarthy always felt that the Yankees lost the pennant in 1940 because of his stubbornness and loyalty to playing Frank Crosetti at Short everyday and not bringing up Rizzuto. That string could have been 6 straight World Championships.

Like Jeter at the top of the order all of last seasin.

Tommy Dee said...

Joe McCarthy always felt that the Yankees lost the pennant in 1940 because of his stubbornness and loyalty to playing Frank Crosetti at Short everyday and not bringing up Rizzuto. That string could have been 6 straight World Championships.

Like Jeter at the top of the order all of last seasin.

ceeja said...

The World Series last year featured two wild card winners. Sacrifice a couple of goats, oh juju guru, and maybe we'll get lucky enough to win an undeserved championship. It will make up for the 1940 loss that still pisses off Tom D. -- and the 1980-81 losses that I can't seem to shake.

Anonymous said...

To all those old enough to remember:

GIRARDI is to REFSNYDER as ARTHUR GODFREY is to JULIUS LA ROSA

HUMILITY

JM said...

Julius La Rosa? Eh, cumpari!

Anonymous said...

WOW...IT'S AS IF EL DUQUE IS READING MY MIND...AND I'M PRETTY SURE THE "ORACLE" IN THE OINTMENT IS BRIAN CASHMAN, AS IT SEEMS AS IF THE STEINBRENNER FAMILY HAS TOTALLY TRUSTED CASHMAN TO THE POINT OF GIVING HIM "THE KEYS TO THE CAR"...ONLY PROBLEM IS IT FEELS LIKE IN THE MOVIE "FERRIS BUELLERS DAY OFF", WHEN THE 2 KIDS TAKE THE FATHERS CAR AND GO NUTS WITH IT.....THIS REFSNYDER SITUATION REALLY IS A BIZARRE ONE TO ME (AND MANY OTHER YANKEE FANS,), AND IT DOES FEEL LIKE CASHMAN IS SAYING TO HIMSELF, "SHIT HE GOT ANOTHER HIT?" WHEN REF DOES GET ONE..LOL...STEPHEN DREW (THE GODOT), IS PLAYING 2ND FOR US BECAUSE OF HIS STELLAR DEFENSE RIGHT?..ONLY PROBLEM IS, WASN'T IT JUST LAST WEEK WHEN HE MADE 2 KILLER ERRORS IN THE SAME GAME THAT LITERALLY COST US THE GAME?...NOW, I AM NOT SUGGESTING THAT HE OR ANYONE ELSE CAN NEVER MAKE AN ERROR, BUT!.......WHEN YOU ARE HITTING BETWEEN .168 AND .205 FOR THE ENTIRE SEASON, THE TOLERANCE LEVEL SHOULD BE SLIM AND NONE RIGHT??? YOU WOULD THINK SO....THE FUNNY THING IS I ACTUALLY GET MADDER WHEN BRENDAN RYAN PLAYS THAN WHEN DREW PLAYS...WHEN I HEAR RYAN IS IN THE STARTING LINEUP BEFORE THE GAME, I WANT TO STICK MY FINGER DOWN MY THROAT AND PUKE UP MY LUNCH...JUST THE FACT THAT REFSNYDER USED THAT "INSIDE OUT" SWING FOR BASE HITS TO THE OPPOSITE FIELD IN THE HANDFUL OF AT-BATS HE HAS HAD (NOT TO MENTION THE GAME WINNING HOME RUN HE HIT),PLUS HIS HIGH ON BASE PERCENTAGE IN HIS MINOR LEAGUE STINTS, HAVE ME SOLD. WHAT WOULD HAVE BEEN THE DOWN SIDE TO LETTING HIM MAN 2ND BASE AFTER HE HELPED US BEAT BOSTON GOING INTO THE 2ND HALF OF THE SEASON? IF HE SHIT THE BED AFTER A 15-20 GAME AUDITION, HE COULD HAVE BEEN SENT BACK TO SCRANTON, AND WE WOULD GO BACK TO THE "NEVER COST US A GAME DEFENSE", RIGHT?.....I THINK YOU GET MY POINT.....

Parson Tom said...

Brendan Ryan has been back for at least two months. He's due for another couple of hits.

Avenge 1940: Fire Girardi!

Leinstery said...

Girardi and the Steinbrenners need to go if the Yankees are to be competitive in this decade. We need an owner who doesn't tolerate mediocrity from his roster and his manager. I know just the guy to take up the mantle.

https://youtu.be/5-cpgvSa9D0?t=1m37s

jdrny said...

Refsnyder 2 for 3 today.
OMG. Yankee brass must be wondering what to do with 5 million Drew.

jdrny said...

Refsnyder 2 for 3 today.
OMG. Yankee brass must be wondering what to do with 5 million Drew.

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