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Tuesday, March 28, 2017

Gotta Curve Somebody

From Nobel laureate Bob Dylan's continuing 2017 baseball forecast, exclusively on Bardball.com:

You may be a young fast baller for Cleveland or Pitt
You may like to rear back and put heat on it
You may want to strike out eight-teen batters a game
You may dream of the high life filled with fortune and fame

But you’re gonna have to curve somebody, if you wanna stay
You’re gonna have to curve somebody
If it’s not in the Big Leagues, then it will be Triple-A
But you’re gonna have to curve somebody

You might be fed cock ‘n’ bull stories about how you’ll be a star
You might have scouts with radar guns readin’ how fast you are
You may have a businessman to help sign you for a lot
They may call you Doctor K but call you up, they will not

Cuz you’re gonna have to curve somebody, if you wanna stay
You’re gonna have to curve somebody
If it’s not in the Big Leagues, then it will be Triple-A
But you’re gonna have to curve somebody

You maybe can reach back with your physical skill
And feel you can reach the mountain top strictly through your will
You may be thinkin’ that you can’t be stopped, at a hundred miles an hour
You may be somebody’s “can’t miss” but you’ll head straight to the showers

Cuz you’re gonna have to curve somebody, if you wanna stay
You’re gonna have to curve somebody
If it’s not in the Big Leagues, then it will be Triple-A
But you’re gonna have to curve somebody

They may call you Nolan, or even Big Train
They may call you Warren Spahn and then pray for rain
They may call you Sandy or maybe Aroldis
They may call you anything but you’d best answer to this

You’re gonna have to curve somebody, if you wanna stay
You’re gonna have to curve somebody
If it’s not in the Big Leagues, then it will be Triple-A
But you’re gonna have to curve somebody

5 comments:

JM said...

This is worthier than the paucity of comments might suggest.

Alibi Ike said...

I was refraining from commenting, didn't want to pad my numbers. Written by illustrator Jim Siergey.

el duque said...

In the case of Mike Mussina, you got to slurve somebody.

Sayonara Kid said...

SLOW TRAIN TO SCRANTON

Sometimes I feel so low-down and disgusted
Can't help but wonder what's happenin' with all these prospects.
What scrap-heap strikeout machine has Cashman found?
Has the "Brass" counted the cost and sent them back down.
All hopes of a classic "Master" homerun call, they're gonna have to abandon.
There's a slow, slow train to Scranton up around the bend...

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