Wednesday, August 25, 2010

Open Letter to Yankees: TRADE FOR JOHNNY DAMON... NOW

Somebody needs to get hurt. Somebody needs to take one for the team. (Not a big injury. Think impacted wisdom tooth.) Gardner, Granderson, either of you guys ever have measles? Now's the time.

We need an excuse to trade for Johnny Damon, the Yankee Play Man.

Lance Breakdown did his part. So did Nick Johnson II. Now, it's up to somebody, anybody, to come down with something.

We need to trade for Johnny Damon, the truest, bluest ex-Yankee of them all.

Today, the Yankiverse can look out on Johnny and channel the words of Sally Fields, when accepting her second Oscar for Norma Jean, or maybe it was for Flying Nun: "You like me, you really like me."

He likes us. He really likes us.

MAKE THIS MAN A YANKEE AGAIN!

6 comments:

Bye Bye Balboni said...

It'll never happen. Why sign an aging player who's a fan favorite and could still be productive when we could sign an aging player from the National League who's headed for the glue factory? Come on, guys, you've gotta think like Cashman!

BernBabyBern said...

I think we have our "Employee of the Month" for August.

One nominee. That's all that's needed.

Lassiter Montalban said...

Damon for Posada. Straight up.

SUPERFRANKENSTEIN said...

We're not allowed to trade for Johnny. The deadline passed a month ago, and Boston grabbed his waiver.

VirginiaO'Possum said...

Yeah, but at least you know the Yankees aren't on his no-trade list. So now that his waiver's been withdrawn, can't Detroit trade him anywhere they want (so long as it's one of the 8 teams Damon pre-approved?)
Must share the WV: it's mingly!

VirginiaO'Possum said...

However, I think your employee of the month might be either Dan Bellino or Joe West.
And, in honor of Hall of Fame Globe sports hack and NESN pontificator, the WV for this message is: gamny!