"Mrs. Canseco, these are the best cantalopes I've ever had. I love coming over just to see what you'll serve."
"Awww, honey, I don't even like her music. I was just out on the town with the guys, and you know how Oil Can is."
"Holy crap! A hypodermic needle! Some junkies must be sneaking into our garage at night. I'll get a new lock."
"Well, to tell you the truth, it's torture having that hot liniment rubbed on my balls before a game. Believe me, it's nothing I look forward to."
"What bruise? That one? Uhhhhm... The other day, over at Jorge's, I accidentally sat on an ice pick."
"No thanks, George, I'd prefer to stand. It's good for the circulation."
"Hey, Piazza... I'm sorry."
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