told A-Rod it won't pay the $6 million bonus in his contract, which he'll get for topping Willie Mays in career HRs. It's a huge dilemma, reminiscent of the Kobayashi Maru. But in the name of James Tiberius Kirk, there could be a solution.
(NOTE: This in no way is a defense of the human pig-monster known as "A-Rod." It is neither fashionable nor moral to defend the fiend, said to be the inspiration for the cult horror classic, "The Babadook." To root for A-Rod is like cheering for ISIS. Every chorus, every report, every mention of his foul name, should come with a track of jeers and hoots, led by the Coalition of the Brown Noses - ruled by generals Madden, Lupica, Harper and the Bristol-based beached white whale, Admiral Schilling - which function as the consciences of baseball. What's important here is that fans be encouraged to boo whenever A-Rod's face appears - like Malcolm McDowell in "A Clockwork Orange." The reflex must be honed. The Yankee ownership must never be held accountable because - wait a minute - enough talk: A-Rod? BOOOO.)
It seems to me this skirmish over $6 million can be easily diffused.
If it's not, it's because the two sides simply want a fight.
A-Rod should earmark the $6 million toward a prominent charity. He doesn't need the cash. This is clam dip money. What he needs is the currency of righteousness, (which he will probably never know for the rest of his life. Wait: I take that back. History is filled with villains who - after befouling their names - devoted the rest of their lives to worthy causes. It's also produced a fair amount of heroes who go on to soil their once-sterling reputations, like the beached white whale in Bristol.) The Yankees, after all, signed that ridiculous contract. If memory serves, they foisted it upon A-Rod at a time when most Yankee fans were happy to say goodbye, due to his opt-out decision.
Put the money toward charity. It's so simple. It's so easy. If they don't... what a bunch of losers.