1. The amazing thought processes that enter into a catcher's decision of what pitch should be thrown next can never be overly analyzed.
2. If a player runs through a stop sign, or makes a mental error, the TV audience never grows tired of hearing about it.
3. When a player takes a ball square to the groin, he can take as long as he needs to recover, and nobody shall mention what happened.
4. Anybody opposing the Yankees -- even if they play for an LA team -- has labored in obscurity and qualifies as a "best kept secret in baseball."5. It is universally accepted that when the pitcher shakes off a catcher's sign, something is terribly, horribly wrong.
6. The world rejoices when the Yankees lose, because it proves that people -- not money -- are what really matter! (This also known as the "Joe Garagiola" rule.)
7. A leadoff batter who plays every day will bat with the bases empty at least 162 times.
8. There is an incredible difference in reality between the 2-2 and a 3-1 count situations, and many people watching at home simply do not understand this.
9. If the Yankees ever sign the despicable Manny Ramirez, the pure totality of evil might signal the end of the world.
10. Joe Buck is a nice, respectful, sincere young man, but he not his father.
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11. That thing that just happened on the field can be generalized into an Unwritten Rule, even if it never happened before and will never happen again.
12. Never talk about Fight Club.
Sort of like the 10th amendment to the Constitution.
Right on, Superfrank! Such is the wacky world of Tim McC's brain.
The "I want to throw a brick through the TV on the off chance it will somehow travel through the wires and strike Tim McCarver in the face" moment (can't write this on Twitter, I'd run out of characters) came in the first inning, when McCarver referred to Pettitte's "balk move."
Now that these unwritten laws have been written, are there other unwritten laws? Wait a minute, don't answer that.
13. The old man in the booth knows more than the manager on the field.
Whatever you do, do not search Amazon.com for "McCarver Sings" and certainly don't use what you find on this blog.
And certainly don't read the reviews.
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