Tuesday, February 28, 2017

If the Grapefruit season ended today, Yankees would be heading for post-season

Happy winter, continued...

Today, Jerry Hall's NY Post sounds a hopeful, if not delusional chorus, bleating that five Yank starters chasing two rotation slots - Adam Warren, Luis Cessa, Luis Severino, Chad Green and Bryan Mitchell - thus far pose an "embarrassment of riches." Yes, the Yankee crash crew has thrown 10 scoreless innings, striking out six. Add them to the renowned "Big Three" - Tanaka, CC and Pinata (aka Maddux, Glavine and Smoltz) - and, well, all these riches... it's embarrassing! The Evil Emp looks like a true contender for the 2017 Grapefruit League crown. And we haven't even seen Jonathan Niese! Nine-man rotation, anyone? So many riches, I'm... oh, dear... does anyone have a spare Tampax?

Meanwhile, the scruddly White Sox are drinking coffee and pacing their cheap motel room, stick-pinning grainy photos of our prospects onto the wall, looking for wild connections. They want to unload Jose Quintana on somebody, anybody - preferably us. The Gammonities say Brian Cashman has a lust thing for Quintana and - at least for now - an embarrassment of riches... too many prospects to ship back to Scranton next month. We should brace ourselves for a trade.

Donno what it would take to get Quintana, but the White Sox are not stupid, and no GM ever wants to be seen helping the dastardly Yankees. Last August, we benefited from having two franchises drunkenly chasing their first World Series in ten generations - creating an unprecedented seller's market. But that priapismic market no longer exists. The White Sox have already pitched 2017 overboard, and Quintana won't cost them an arm and a leg. Thus, they won't settle for a pair of lungs and livers. It won't be Refnyder and Romine.

It's always pointless to speculate on future Cashman trades: They never come off as projected. But let's brace ourselves - for him dealing two or three prospects that, in our dreams, have already been enshrined to Monument Park. My guess: Chicago would demand something akin to Severino and Clint Frazier - and if so, I'd say fukkit.

Last week, I watched a film about the 1961 Yankees, greatest team in history. That March, we suffered no embarrassments of riches. The Yankees finished dead last in the Grapefruit League. It's a long season ahead, folks. Enjoy this while it lasts. Embarrassments come in many forms.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

EVERY TIME I READ THE NAME JOSE QUINTANA, IT MAKES ME THINK OF CHRIS SALE.
IT MAKES ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE TO PART WITH ANY OF OUR TOP PROSPECTS FOR A "LESSER" PITCHER THAN CHRIS SALE.
.....AND THAT MY FRIENDS IS THE DIFFERENCE OF A GM THAT HAS THE SKILL OF TALENT EVALUATION AND THE FORESIGHT TO MAKE THE RIGHT MOVE AT THE RIGHT TIME.

John M said...

We're not going to win it all this year. Couldn't Cashman just stand pat and see what he's got? A good pitcher isn't going to make a difference.

And ANON, every time I see Quintana I think of quinoa and hipsters sitting at Formica diner tables in trendy vegan restaurants. It's not a pretty picture.

Honey Barnes said...

PRIAPRIASMIC

Well Done on a Tuesday Moning.

Anonymous said...

See your doctor for an erection lasting for more than four hours (that includes tRUMP's wall).

We, here at IIH.... have a jones for the IBS Lady, Honey....in case you didn't know....

Saw that commercial again last night, and - - I admit - - it made my Putter Flutter!!!!

Heck, I call my doctor & crow for any erection lasting longer than 4 MINUTES....
(how's that for priapism?? LB (No J)

Anonymous said...

I COULD NEVER UNDERSTAND THE PROBLEM WITH AN ERECTION LASTING MORE THAN 4 HOURS...

joe de pastry said...

Let me join in the well-deserved praise for Ms. IBS.
As someone who has long suffered from that condition I wish she had been following me around when I was young enough to have an erection lasting more than 4 minutes.