Super Poll: Which is the better management team?

Saturday, February 11, 2017

Saturday sausage links

By this time next week, the Yankiverse will be ejaculating with news tidbits about so-and-so arriving "in the best shape of his career," and "primed for a breakout season," maybe even having "a whole new outlook," raising hopes among fans... and eyebrows among the hookers of Tampa.

Fake news. Might as well come from Macedonia middle-schoolers. Brace yourselves, folks. The first wave of bullshit is about to arrive. 

In the meantime, we must make-do with these slippery little news-like thingys.

The Yankees have released seven minor league pitchers you never heard of and, now, never will. All I'm saying is this: One was/is named - get this - Zak Wasserman, and he had been signed last year from - get this - the Windy City Thunderbolts. I swear this is true. If I'm lying, may the Irritatible Bowel Syndrome lady appear unto my water closet. There is/was a Zak Wasserman and a Windy City Thunderbolts, but neither matters any more to the future of the Yankees. Wait. That's too harsh. Being an obscure writer, I have a thing for obscure players. Let's wish Zak Wasserman the best. Let's wish them all good luck. And if they get a chance to sit it out or dance... I hope they dance.

Newsday asks, "What's next for Gary Sanchez?" (In the competition for asking trenchant questions, Charlie Rose aint losing sleep.) What's next for Gary? My guess: He shows up for camp this week "in the best shape of his career" and "ready for a breakout season." What's next for Newsday? Clicks, I guess. Isn't that why you use questions in headlines? Because you have no answers? What's next for IT IS HIGH? That would have been a better tag, no?

Brian Cashman went on talk radio yesterday to hawk the brand - (By the way, Kellyanne could have done a better job) - and basically said the reason for signing all-or-nothing back-up DH Chris Carter was that he was... cheap. Real cheap. It's rare that the Retrieval Empire's bold and courageous flea market strategy has been so nakedly revealed. If the price is right, Cash will buy anything - maybe even a team Squatty Potty. Will we sign a last minute rag arm? Yes, as long as nobody else puts in a bid. 

Now that the buzzwords of "public altercation" and "resisting arrest" have faded, New Yorkers are starting to realize that they have far more respect for Charles Oakley than James Dolan, owner of the worst-run sports franchise on planet Earth. The Gray Lady's Michael Powell writes, "The Knicks seemed to realize Friday that they had taken a sledgehammer to their brand, as N.B.A. stars such as Dwyane Wade, LeBron James and Chris Paul, as well as former players and television celebrities, rallied quickly to Oakley’s defense." Whatever Oakley may have shouted at Dolan - he claims he said nothing - there's not a Knick fan in captivity who wouldn't have yelled worse. You know those GOP Congressional oil cans who are getting screamed at in town meetings? That's nothing compared to what Dolan would hear, if he were ever put in a room with ticket-holders. This isn't over. Hashtag: We are all Charles Oakley. 

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

YOU KNOW WHO ELSE WE COULD HAVE HAD ON THE CHEAP (EVEN THOUGH WE COULDN'T HIT A LICK)? ...... NELSON CRUZ COMING OFF A 40 HOMER YEAR AT 8 MILLION FOR 1 SEASON (WHO DELIVERED 44 HOME RUNS AND A .369 OBP THAT NEXT YEAR)......NOW THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN A NO-BRAINER MOVE FROM A SKILLED GM....... INSTEAD, WE INVESTED "ONLY 5 MILLION" FOR STEPHEN DREW THAT YEAR....... THINK OF THIS.....WOULD WE HAVE BEEN A BETTER TEAM WITH ROB REFSNYDER AT 2ND BASE AND NELSON CRUZ IN OUR LINEUP EVERYDAY?...... OR BETTER WITH CASHMAN'S PLAN, SCRAPPING REFSNYDER TO HAVE THE SOLIDITY OF THE BETTER FIELDING STEPHEN DREW (WHO WASN'T EVEN A PROVEN 2ND BASEMEN AT THE TIME)? ............ THIS IS REASON NUMBER 500 WHY CASHMAN IS KILLING US.....

Anonymous said...

You're right, -caps, but think of it this way: IF we had signed Nellie the C and DH'd him, as soon as he hit multiple homers in one game, or a couple of days in a row went 3 for 4 or something, Joey Blue-Binders would have noticed that he looked tired, running the bases, and benched him for a day or two - - OR, he would have hit a double, first time up, and Joey would have put in a pinch-runner, or something....Obviously Cash-Puss knew this, and saved us some grief....think of it, would you rather be angry, or bored?? THAT is the choice Yankee brass has been giving us, year after year, lately.
The last time I remember anybody saying ANYTHING good about Dolan (besides his Mommy) was about 1989....his dog can't talk, but if he could....whoo, boy!
Gimme' the Irritable Bowel Lady - - please!! C'mon, Bri-Bri....I'll get down and bark like a dog, if you hire her!! LB (No J)

Alphonso said...

Dolan is the classic, " I inherited it ," failure. The guy's brain is in his toilet bowl.

He is a pig, an idiot and, due to his inherited wealth, untouchable. The knicks will be a laughing stock until he dies. Does he have a chubby son waiting in the wings? Perhaps going to an ivy league school where a new building carries the Dolan name?

As a close friend of The Donald, I would not be surprised to see him be a Republican candidate for President, in the near future

And, by appealing to the Trumpian base, he will likely win.

The Knicks used to be revered. Now they are a pathetic joke.

Ever since the Pat Ewing trade. And that is before many of this blog's readers were born.

Anonymous said...

DOLAN IS SUCH AN AMAZING ASSHOLE, HIS CABLE BUSINESS IS SO HATEABLE BECAUSE ON LONG ISLAND WHERE I LIVE, FOR SOME REASON HE HAS A MONOPOLY ON TV, INTERNET, AND PHONE IN MY AREA. ...( I HAVE HEARD, IT IS BECAUSE HE LIVES IN THE AREA)......YOU CAN GO WITH ANOTHER COMPANY (VERIZON) WHICH I HAVE DONE..... DOLAN'S CABLEVISION (NOW CALLED "OPTIMUM" FOR SOME REASON)... IS SO ENRAGING.....THE BILL GOES UP...AND UP...AND UP..AND UP..AND UP....AND YOU FINALLY GET SO ENRAGED, YOU CALL THE COMPANY AND SAY, "WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?...3 MONTHS AGO, MY BILL WAS $145 DOLLARS....THEN 2 MONTHS AGO, IT WAS $147...LAST MONTH IT WAS $149, ...NOW THIS COCKSUCKING MONTH, IT'S $151 !!!! ...WTF IS GOING ON?!?!?!....AND THE SONOFABITCH, DOESN'T WAVER..... HE TELLS HIS EMPLOYEES NOT TO CRACK AND JUST TELL THEM THERE IS NOTHING THEY CAN DO TO REDUCE THE BILL (EVEN THOUGH I WAS A CUSTOMER FOR OVER 17 YEARS)!!!.....THE FUNNY PART IS THEY ALWAYS TOUT HOW NEW CUSTOMERS CAN START A 2 YEAR CONTRACT FOR $69.00 PER MONTH, BUT I TOLD THEM I WAS A CUSTOMER FOR 17 YEARS!...WHY CAN'T I GET THE $69.00 DEAL?....THEY DIDN'T WANT TO HEAR IT!!!...CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT??...MAYBE THAT'S WHY OAKLEY WANTED TO CRUSH HIM....HE IS THE ULTIMATE ASSHOLE.....