Friday, December 14, 2007

YANKEETORIAL: WHY DID "VIAGRA" MITCHELL LET FANS SLIDE?

Open letter to George Mitchell:

Dear Madam or Sir:

Yesterday, you said the following:

"Everyone involved in baseball over the past two decades — commissioners, club officials, the players' association and players — shares to some extent the responsibility for the Steroids Era. There was a collective failure to recognize the problem as it emerged and to deal with it early on."

Well, well... that about covers it, eh? Let's see... the Commish... the teams... the players... the union... you forgot their wives and children... but that should do it, right?

WRONG.

WHAT ABOUT THE BIGGEST ENABLERS: THE FANS?

That's right, Mitchell, you Redsock toadie. The fans.

They're the ones who buy the logo underwear, read the ignorant memoirs, clap to the Gary Glitter (child molester) song and basically ruin baseball for the rest of us.

Why do the players shoot up? Because the fans demand it.

Why do the teams look the other way? Because the fans look the other way.

Why is baseball corrupt? Because the fans are corrupt.

WHEN WILL MLB SHOW THE GUTS TO CRACK DOWN ON ITS DIRTIEST LAUNDRY? THE JERKS WHO SIT IN THE STANDS.

Think about it. Eliminate the fans. Play the games in solitude, without interference by those loathsome, chubby yips who scream into people's ears, litter the grounds with candy wrappers, and form lines 100-feet long in front of you when you have to go to the bathroom, and you can't wait.

THEY ARE RUINING THE GAME.

Frankly, sir, we were hoping for more from you. We guess the Viagra must be clouding your mind.

1 comment:

Mustang said...

And publish the names of the fans!

They deserve no better.