to match Super Bowl ring he took from Robert Kraft.
2. ISIS - to maintain standards of pure evil.
3. North Korea dictator Li'l Kim - except he's dead.
4. Carl Yastremski - because he still has no ring.
5. Dick Cheney - to pay off Satan and live forever.
6. Bud Selig - final, convoluted poke at A-Rod.
8. Ben Affleck - out of sheer hatred for Yankees.
9. George Zimmerman - trust me: he's behind this, somehow.
10. Madonna - for her collection.