Sunday, October 26, 2014

They want A-Rod to beg, to grovel, to weep... but only one thing can redeem Alex Rodriguez's soul

In today's Murdoch,  Joel Sherman says the possible public redemption of Alex Rodriguez will require a campaign of Christlike humility and requests for forgiveness. He says baseball may someday allow A-Rod back into its heavenly graces, but first, this shallowest of men must address the fundamental character flaws that turned him such a loathsome, wretched, cowardly Gollum.

The larger question is whether there is sincerity here to try a new way or whether this is just one more time he is playing a part scripted by lawyers, crisis managers and public relations handlers.
In many — perhaps most — precincts, he never will be forgiven. There is just too much damage there. Not just the steroid use, but the serial lying and the brew of insincerity and insecurity, greed and ego, duplicity and selfishness that forge a personality impossible to trust and difficult to embrace.
For the record, I would like to - once again - note that Al Rodriguez (his new name) has never been accused of: 
1. Beating a wife or girlfriend.
2. Whipping or abusing as child.
3. Training or encouraging dogs to tear each other apart for entertainment.
4. Orchestrating a 20-year campaign to cover up massive brain injuries to three generations of paid employees.
5. Killing a family while driving drunk.
6. Single or double homicide.
7. Punching out a team's white-haired traveling secretary, shooting people with squirt guns full of bleach,  vaulting into the stands to attack fans, texting snapshots of genetalia, etc.
Let's face it: At the root of everything, Alex Rodriguez is accused of being a dick. 
And in life, we all meet and know our share of dicks. 
Quite often, they are people who have reached a certain status of mukkity-muk, and/or managed to make or inherit a lot of money - (which, of course, makes them an authority on everything.) On the personal, molecular level, most dicks never change. They are just big, stinking, asshole dicks, and that's all there is to it.
If A-Rod starts bowing and scraping, some Gammonites will simply accuse him of being more duplicitous than ever. That is because they are dicks, too.
At a certain level, I believe capitalism manages to gather and quarantine the greatest dicks of human evolution. They coagulate into top corporate offices or elite gated communities, where they fight over issues the rest of us ignore - like what colors of lawn furniture should be banned, or how everybody else should live... you know, that kind of stuff. 
As a fan, I consider myself blessed in that I never have to interact closely with the great athletes of my generation, because they will turn out to be pompous and conniving dicks. The job of dealing with these supreme dicks goes to team officials, sportswriters, groupies and hangers-on. As far as I'm concerned, they earn every penny for their hard work. I do not envy them - not at all.
Thus, what I want from Al Rodriguez next year is .280, 25 HR, 90 RBI and 80 games at third base. If he provides that - or something close to it - he will have redeemed his soul to me. (I also believe that if A-Rod hits, the Gammonites will also no longer blast him as a lying dick, because that's how dicks react to success.) 
But if A-Rod he hits .210 - ouch.

If A-Rod hits .210, it won't matter whether he personally washes the feet of his enemies. No amount of contrition in this world will spare him from a chorus of angry and spiteful Gammonites. (And here on this site, we will be dicks, too.)
Still... until A-Rod starts beating women and/or children, let's keep things in perspective, OK? He needs 200 at bats before we judge his soul.


KD said...

wonder if A-Rod drives slow in the left lane too. Driving through Jersey, you'll find every dick in the state putting along in the left lane. They are everywhere.

Mustang said...

“Tenants living in A-Rod-managed properties in Maryland, largely working-class immigrants from Latin America, have had to deal with the most horrific living conditions. To add insult to injury, local managers blame the tenants themselves for the situation, hire goonish private security officers to intimidate them, and threaten folks who organize their neighbors with eviction.”

el duque said...

You think Hal Steinbrenner doesn't have shady real estate holdings?

Why are you covering up for Hal?

Mustang said...

I hate Hal, too.

KD said...

I checked out the article and wasn't convinced. It was mostly snarky anti-Al bullshit. there weren't even any pictures of the bad conditions, although I have no doubt the place was pretty gross. However, it's not always the building owners that make these dwellings gross. you could put some of these people in your house, walk away for a month, then return and you may be in for a shock.

We had a small house in a marginal neighborhood in Stillwater, Oklahoma that we couldn't sell due to a down market. Had trouble finding renters and finally agreed to participate in the Section 8 program. after 6 months, you wouldn't have recognized the place. Carpet torn out, walls full of holes. Light fixtures and pipes stolen. Appliances gone. Bathroom destroyed. Trash everywhere. Horrific conditions, for sure. I guess that made my wife and I "slumlords". we fixed up the place and sold it at a loss. fuck it.

Many poor people are good; they just don't have much and need a break. They've still got pride. Many others are poor for a reason. they can only be kept from squalor with 24/7 maid service.

el duque said...

If he's a slumlord, that's prime dick status, and I'm not arguing that he's not a dick.

Cooperstown is full of dicks.