Monday, October 6, 2014

The Peeve of Peeves: More than anything, John and Suzyn HATE watching Yankees hitters fail to exploit the overshift

Someday, if our past petition drives ever gain traction, John Sterling will get his chance to manage the Yankees. On that day, certain Yankees will receive an earful.

They will be scolded like never before. They will hear about the wastefulness - the shamefulness! - of allowing defensive over-shifts to destroy not only their Yankee careers - but the Yankees.

Certain players - we're not naming names - apparently cannot alter their precious swings in order to exploit the wide-open fields, which have been left uncovered due to over-shifts. (Over-gifts, they should be called.)

They cannot bunt for a hit or slap a routine grounder into the opposite field - even when the Yankees need a base-runner more than a home run. They just swing harder and hit the ball where the defense is waiting to catch it.

This incompetence has been named Top 2014 John and Suzyn Shitlist Peeve in a non-scientific poll.

Of nearly 200 hardened Yankee fans, 43 percent named Inability to Exploit the Over-shift as John & Suzyn's top peeve.

First-runner up - and we should note that if, next year, all Yankees DO exploit the over-shift, and thus, the reigning peeve cannot complete its term, this would take over as the Top Peeve - is Missed Yankee Scoring Opportunities, with 37 percent.

Placing third was the Tropicana Dome Sound System - a hellhole of bizarre whistles and clattering sounds, which play at ear-splitting levels. It had 11 percent.

Fourth place goes to Leadoff Walks Issued by Yankee Pitchers, with 7 percent.

Congratulations to all the Peeves who entered this year's contest. Remember: There are no losers here. Each Peeve is a pain in the butt, and I'm sure each will return next year, more troublesome than ever. Good luck to all.


KD said...

Know what else the Master hates? He HATES fans who waive white towels. Far from encouraging their team, THEY ARE WAIVING THE WHITE FLAG OF SURRENDER!!! It's worse than the Gott-damn Rally Monkey, ferchristsake.

well, I hate it anyhow. And the Master would hate it too, if he thought about it.

KD said...

I also hate knumbnuts who write waive instead of wave.

I'll be quiet now.

KD said...

This poll was all yours, LBJ. Any thoughts regarding the results? (I admit, I voted for the winner many times. Gotta love Blogger polls!)