Monday, February 23, 2015

Oscar wrap-up: In a different Stephen Hawking universe, the Yankees ruled last night's awards

Best as I can figure, the Yankees' only links to last night's ceremonies were: 

1) Stephen Hawking suffers from Lou Gehrig's disease. 

2) "Birdman" could easily refer to Mark "Big Bird" Fidrych, who made his mark beating the Yankees. 

3) Julianne Moore's winning character, "Still Alice," isn't the only person who won't remember the 2014 Yankee team.

4) "The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance." There has be something in there, somewhere, relating to the idea that Carlos Beltran is going make a comeback. 

Let's hope the physicists and comic book writers are right about alternative universes: 

In a more enjoyable Yankee Matrix, last night, Jack Nicholson won an Oscar. During his emotional acceptance speech, he demanded that the Yankees sign Yoan Moncada. 

The presenter, Richard Gere, added that he hoped the world would hear Nicholson's plea, and host Adam Sandler then asked the audience to stand in solidarity. At that point, Ben Affleck was physically "escorted" from the arena - a few broken ribs, he'll be fine - and then Lady Gaga - diverting from her planned presentation - defiantly sang the Yankee theme song. 

Somehow, we have become lodged in the wrong Yankee Matrix.


1 comment:

Leinstery said...

Birdman is clearly a nod to the legendary Yankee mascot Dandy, a big stupid bird that resembled Thurmon Munson and was routinely beaten up by fans.