Thursday, May 4, 2017

Nine thoughts about - well - what else? MOAB

1. Apparently, MOAB - aka Aaron Judge - broke Joe Girardi's binders. (Normally, Joe benches anyone who gets this hot. Under the rules of Joe's calculations, MOAB should have been sent to Scranton by now.)

2. In the same way that Mike Ditka changed the NFL - a big, fast, brutal tight end - and Magic Johnson the NBA - a point guard the size of a center, MOAB could become the future prototype for baseball position players. Originally, scouts said his size would kill him: MLB pitchers would exploit holes in his huge strike zone. That may still happen. But don't be surprised if 10 years from now, outfields are commonly patrolled by guys the size of Jeeps.

3. Giving MOAB number 99 - the largest available - was a stroke of genius.

4. MOAB is entering the second phase of Elizabeth Kubler-Zadora's Five Stages of Media Hype: Arrival, Hyperbole, Ubiquity, Overkill, Date J-Lo. 

5. The greatest advantage to having Matt Holliday is that Girardi does not need to bat MOAB third. No need for extra pressure. (But that will soon come.)

6. If Sanchez and Bird emerge - no guarantees - we must guard from pretending to be the Yankee '17 Hall of Fame Superteam of Destiny (TM). 

7. MOAB is already the most electrifying Yankee hitter since early A-Rod. He could become the most dominant Yankee since the Curse ended, and Boston started winning the rivalry. (Note: This thought is categorized in Number four's "Overkill" phaze.)

8. His slow start last year could be one of the best things that happened. MOAB knows what it is like to be humbled. Yankee fans must remember this as other young players make bad first impressions. 

9. Soon, the distractions of Gotham will start intervening. It's inevitable. For now, let's just stand back and enjoy this. It can't last the whole season... right? 

12 comments:

BernBabyBern said...

I want to read a book written by Elizabeth Kubler-Zadora.

Anonymous said...

THINK OF THIS....
THE M.O.A.B. IS NOT FAR FROM HALFWAY TO 40 HOMERS ALREADY!!!!!!
STAY HEALTHY....PLEASE, STAY HEALTHY.

Alphonso said...

We can't let him buy or enter a nightclub; carry a piece; purchase a mink coat; or consume alcohol.

Leave that to the fans.

Leave that to me.

BernBabyBern said...

Dear Lord, please keep Aaron Judge away from Cameron Diaz ...

Beana27 said...

... and Madonna and Kate Hudson...

Joe F said...

...AND anything that resembles an Underground Poker club

Anonymous said...

MAYBE JUDGE WOULD BE BEST OFF WITH THE IBS LADY...... KEEP HIM REGULAR.

Anonymous said...

SERIOUSLY GUYS, WE MAY HAVE TO ACT SOON ON CC...... HE HAS BEEN REAL SHITTY THE LAST COUPLE STARTS, AND I JUST CAN'T SEE HIM MAKING IT THROUGH EVEN HALF THE SEASON. (NOT WITHOUT LOSING A BOAT LOAD OF GAMES FOR US, OR GETTING HURT)..... WE ARE GOING TO NEED A BACK UP PLAN FOR CC..... THE SOONER, THE BETTER.

Anonymous said...

Oh, the irony of MOAB, and Sanchez (and possibly Birdie) toiling away for years, yet, at near league minimum, while we pay CC his 27 million or whatever; last game was horrid - - gave up six runs in the first two innings - - but Joey B set his jaw, and left him in - - the Yanks MUST have their innings from their expensive starters, of course....Granted, he did calm down a bit after the first two - - thank goodness - - but - - I wonder if Torreyes or Ref can pitch....anybody but Ells or MOAB - - don't want to wreck that cannon, or risk wrecking that swing. LB (No J)

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Cannon?

Anonymous said...

Cannon of an arm, Rufus - - my point was that he might be as good a right-fielder as he is a hitter, if the throws in from RF are any indication, at this point.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

Anon,

Sorry, I was confused (not unusual for a Friday). I thought you were referring to Ellsbury with the cannon comment. It just didn't seem right. Makes MUCH more sense now.

My bad.