Sunday, February 17, 2019

It's hard to believe we're hearing the truth about Jacoby Ellsbury

Hot scoop: Jacoby Ellsbury will miss opening day.

(Insert laugh track.) 

Last year, he didn't play a down. Not one. It was one ailment after another. Legs, hip, ankle. Now it's the feet. At this point, it really doesn't matter. He's not a player. He's a punch line. We can't even trade him for another team's pariah.  The Yankees will pay him $21,142,857 this year and next. Then in 2021, they'll have the option of a $5 million buyout. I wonder what they'll do. (See what I mean? A punch line.) 

Wait a minute. My spider sense is tingling. Something's fishy here. If I were the IRS, I'd launch an audit. Do the Yankees plan to write off Ellsbury's entire salary, through insurance? If so, that's a double victory for the Yankee owner, and a double loss for fans.

Here's why: 

Whether the Yankees pay him or not, Ellsbury's salary affects the team's payroll tax: All $21,142,857 goes into calculating whether the Yankees are over the luxury tax threshold. But if they actually don't pay Ellsbury, because insurance foots the bill, what a scam!

Hal Steinbrenner can use Ellsbury's numbers to plead fiscal integrity, saying it's ridiculous for the Yankees to land above the tax threshold, because they put money into the hands of competitors. This argument receives a lot endorsements from the Gammonites, who seldom question Yankee austerity plans.

But what if the Yankees don't even have to pay Ellsbury? Then Hal gets to wave his surrender flag and sit out negotiations for Harper and Machado - citing the tax threshold - and then have insurance pay the full load on Ellsbury.

Right now, it's hard to imagine Ellsbury ever playing for the Yankees. The fans would revolt. And why should he, especially if both sides are agreeable to his current status - sitting out, getting paid and spending time with his family. 

Something's just not right. 

The Yankees are notoriously secretive about injuries. They see no advantage in disclosing the truth about injuries, and let's face it: they're not a government entity. They can say whatever they wish. They can lie, if it suits their interests. Nobody cares. 

But this deal with Ellsbury is really looking crooked. If I were an insurance company, I would be looking to hire Robert Mueller, as soon as he's free.

19 comments:

Anonymous said...

SHHHHH, MR. DUQUE...

IN THE FUTURE, WE WONT EVEN PONY UP THE BUCKS FOR A DJ LEMAHIEU IF WE DON'T GET AWAY WITH THIS SCAM.

SHHHHH.....

Vampifella said...

I'm sure that the Yanks are going to say that they are loosing money on the player insurances. Combine everything from all the ones which they do insure and it's probably $25+ million, far more than what they are getting back when they do make a claim (which is 70% of the actual contract, or so I hear). Who knows if any of that is true, but that's what will be said. POVERTY!

Either way, I think there is something A LOT more wrong with him than just his feet. Has anyone actually seen the guy in a year? More than likely he had expired a year ago rather than his career. They could at least Weekend at Bernie's his carcass around to keep suspicions down.

Really they are lying to keep his non-existent value up. That benefits both the Yanks and the player. He'll want another contract when this one ends and the Yanks still has some hope that they can unload him. It benefits no one to be truthful about any this.

JM said...

Els seems to be a stand-up guy, but I wonder. $20 million is a lot of dough for reading magazines. I'd like to believe he wouldn't do it unless he had no choice. But how does a pro athlete break down so badly for so long? I wonder what the truth is.

Meanwhile, today is my mom's 95th birthday. I can't be there thanks to the bronchitis. She claims this is the first time I won't be with her on her b-day, ever. I'm not so sure. But it is sad that she may never see another Yankees championship.

I guess that goes for all of us.

TheWinWarblist said...

I know how Els feels. I've injured my back. Only the second time my back has ever given me a problem. The first was years ago when I was doing squats, 12 or 14 heavy plates; I could feel low back muscles tear. This time I rolled over in bed or sneezed. Totally wrecked my back. I'll be starting spring training on the Injured (but still sexy!) List. I'm kinda drugged up today, laying on the floor and staring at the ceiling. No way to hustle down the line when you can't stand upright. I should put on some King Crimson and just go with it.

Oww. Oww.




Fuckers.

13bit said...

King Crimson - you're the best, Winnie. Sorry about your back. Lower back stuff is no joke. Actually, any back stuff is no joke.

I'm taking care of the pup, who somehow tore a nail off at the base. So much blood I had to take him to the emergency vet. He's doing okay, but I cannot wait to get the wrapping/bandage/booty off. I also cannot get a straight answer from them on how often it should be changed. I'm hoping my vet is open tomorrow.

I have an amazing tape from Crimson's "Discipline" tour. If we ever all meet at the Stadium. remind me to bring you a copy. I am hoping we can get a quorum of 10 at a game some hot summer night this year.

I'm dealing with some shoulder/neck/pectoral thing at the moment, as well as a wrist thing on my fretting hand and an intermittent ankle thing. The good news is that I woke up today! The bad news is that Hal and Brian still run Los Yanquis.

Feel better.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Sorry to hear about the setbacks, Warbler, 13bit, and 13bit's pooch! And John M., happy 95th to your mom who, at least, has been alive for 26 of the 27 rings!

HoraceClarke66 said...

Also, Duque, let's remember that, after this whole amazing scam, Ellsbury is trotted out rhetorically by Coops as one of the six, count 'em, six! outfielders they have so they don't need Harper.

Incredible.

In their spare time—which must be almost ALL their time—do Hal and Coops walk around and work various razzles, just to keep sharp? I picture them walking into bodegas and pulling off some basic change scam: "Okay, let's see, I gave you $20 for that pack of gum, but my friend here gave you $10, which means you owe us each $25..."

KD said...

After coming off the DL for swamp ass, it will be discovered Els has a zit not quite ripe for popping. Another 15 days on the DL. Hal’s already started the paperwork.

JM said...

Lark's Tongue in Aspic remains one of all time favorites. Not so crazy about the Belew Crimson, but hey. It's all subjective.

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...


OFF TOPIC (just a bit) --

NJ.com has a list of all of the $$$ included in contracts the NYYs have with various players -- one figure for actual pay, another figure for the "luxury tax" amount.

Not history --- 2019 numbers.

https://www.nj.com/yankees/2019/02/here-are-yankees-2019-salaries-luxury-tax-figures-for-every-signed-player.html

...note that I am not and never have been in the employ of said site.

13bit said...

I like a post where I can read about "swamp ass" and "Lark's Tongue In Aspic" in the same thread and have it all kind of make sense.

Local Bargain Jerk said...


I like a post where I can read about "swamp ass" and "Lark's Tongue In Aspic" in the same thread and have it all kind of make sense.

But it's disturbing that some of us are clinging to old-fashioned expressions like "DL" just as others of us are clinging to old-fashioned baseball concepts such as ERA, Batting Average, Wins, and Losses.

(Just kidding KD. Trying to make a point here.)

Pocono Steve said...

John Wetton-era King Crimson is the best, for sure, but I saw the six-piece, Belew-led version of the band in Rochester in '95, and their rendition of Larks' Tongues in Aspic, Pt 2, was pretty boss, I have to confess.

13bit said...

Savoy Ballroom, November 1981 - Boom

TheWinWarblist said...

King Crimson in NYC at The Party on the Pier, Summer 1982.

Oww.



Fuckers.

Carl J. Weitz said...

Damn, there are some old fossils here even older than I am!

The insurance pays Ells contract at 78%. The answer to the question "why doe his body break down so much" is steroids. Jacoby reminds me of another ex-Red Sox and Oriole....a skinny guy suddenly hitting for average and power: Brady Anderson. Brady was before testing and never got caught. Ells had one very good year and turned it into this albatross of a contract.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Which is really a form of fraud, that hurts us all.

i know, I know, as we all say: I wouldn't turn down $21 mill a year.

But you could also say that his steroid use was a way of actively—and deceptively—soliciting that money. We DON'T all go around making up scams and working the against all of our fellow New Yorkers and baseball fans.

Anonymous said...

Karma's a bitch. Then again $21 million dollars buys a lot of Eccos.

Doug K.

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