Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Louisiana Future Poisoned By Absence Of MLB


I have two theories about baseball:

1. Haiti has failed in every dimension of society because it cut its trees for charcoal instead of bats, whereas the Dominican is succeeding as a cuture and society because it has bats and baseball fields instead of charcoal.

For those of you who don't read, Haiti and The Dominican share the same island.

2. The game, at the major league level, can re-build societies everywhere except Washington D.C.

Which brings me to Louisiana. Yesterday, the following marked a typical day for that state:

A. It was reported that education achievements of Louisiana grade-schoolers and high school dropouts remained mired as " 49th worst in US" ( just edging out Mississippi ).

B. A woman was arrested for intentionally running over and killing her 11 year-old son.

C. At the world famous Mardi-Gras parade, seven people were randomly shot including an infant. Two New Orleans boys were arrested on the scene.

D. Rising Republican super nova and Governor, " Pinky" Jindal ( or is it Jingle?), has indicated he will not accept for Louisiana $3.7 Billion of fiscal stimulus money from Washington.

Yes, "Bobby" Joe Jindal ( note his clever adoption of a "good old boy" first name ) would rather let free market, unregulated forces work their way to higher unemployment and misery for the citizens of the "Bayou" State, than bend, modify or question any of the fine Republican principles of torture, arrogance, unjustified invasions of sovereign nations, or "no more taxes" mantra, in hopes of carving out a killer conservative platform on which to pursue his personal ambitions in 2012.

This business of , " a government of the people, by the people and for the people is so 18th century, " Bobby is rumored to have said to his foresome while teeing off recently at the exclusive "Baton Rouge" Country Club.

At last report, word from Bobby J, issued through a spokeswoman at his tax-payer funded Governor's Mansion, was that he would only accept $3.6 Billion for the State ( eliminating $100 million to extend unemployment benefits).

" Let them eat King Cake," eh Bobby?

In order to extract Louisiana from this kind of failed leadership ( who votes for this guy?), complete societal decay, and in order to save Louisiana from having to burn all of its vegetation for charcoal, Bud Selig needs to move the Nationals from D.C. to Lousiana this year.

Only Major League baseball can protect this State from itself.


6 comments:

Alibi Ike said...

Only if the women in the upper deck follow tradition when someone throws them beads.

Anonymous said...

Louisiana Lootie's

Anonymous said...

Like you said;"bloggers are too lazy to research history". or facts apparently. Jindal is gov. because the previous was a disaster. I suggest you leave politics off the sports blogs. All the dems who say 'give Obama time, he inherited all this' should be able to say the same of another first time exec.

Alibi Ike said...

Wait a minute, I'M the one too lazy to research history, not Alphonso.

Anonymous said...

No research is needed for Louisiana politics.

The incompetence and corruption are just matters of degree.

Like ; who's worse, Bernie Madoff, or Sir Stanford?

You can go back to old what's his name ( Huey Long?)....they are all corrupt, incompetent, and self-indulging.

That's just he way it is down there.

By the way, that Illinois dude
( Blogdogovich ...OK, I can't spell either ) is Governor ( was Governor) " because the previous was a disaster."

So I say, let's burn them early.

I will change my view, however, if " Pinky Jingle " makes a move to get the Washington Nationals to Louisiana.

Alibi Ike said...

"Pinky Jingle" -- sounds like how an Anime princess would describe sex.

(Not from personal experience, you understand.)