My Gift To Nick Johnson

I'm sure it comes as no surprise to hear that Nick Johnson has had yet another set back in his wrist.

The player whom all but Brian Cashman knew could not stay healthy for more than two weeks, even with a part-time DH job (where he was mostly required to take pitches ), is shuttling from pool side to NYC today for several more MRIs, Cat Scans, and Swami readings on his ailing wrist.

I'm told that Nick had progressed to hitting a whiffle ball off a tee when the latest twinges surfaced.

My solution; Nick should never hold anything in his hand that weighs more than 5 ounces deadweight.

For his next phase of re-hab, therefore, I propose plastic and air. No balls to hit. Nick must come in contact with nothing harder than a hamburger. His swings will be on non-windy days only, where even the air cannot provide resistance.

Alternatively, we can all drop the charade and announce that we are dropping this lowlife excuse for a player and see if we can get Johnny Damon back. How many millions are we paying for nothing? Just like rewarding the investment bankers for failure.

Cashman should be sent to Russia where his baseball decisions can't hurt the Yankees anymore.

If he only had a brain.