The Abyss Gazes Back

FIFTY THOUSAND MOONS

Friday, April 8, 2016

Ruh-roh: Tex says he can play five, six more years - creating a problem Yankee fans never used to have

In the shower stall yesterday, after beating Houston with a HR, Mark Teixeira stated what must be Food Stamps Steinbrenner's worst fear:

After this season ends, and his Yankee contract ends, he doesn't intend to move to Maryland, run for dog catcher and take up scrap-booking. He told the Gray Lady:

“I think you guys are putting way too much on a freak injury that happened last year,” Teixeira said. “They happen to players all over the place. I feel great. I feel like I’m going to play another five or six seasons.”

Five more years? Impossible. Well, actually, no. He's only 35 (the age Ellsbury will be when his Yankee contract ends.) Last year, Tex played in 111 games. We were a battleship with him, a barge without him. And any working Yankee fan can't help but picture that inevitable moment when Tex grabs a hammy or checks his swing, and - immediately - our 1B becomes Chris Parmelee, which is cadence code for Lyle Overbay. If Tex goes down, our replacement strategy is to shake our dicks at God over the injury to Greg Bird. (And we still don't even know if Bird is real or a Kevin Maas mirage. I ask you: Is that any way for the Fates to act?)

Back to Tex. Food Stamps has made it clear he's sitting on his fanny pack until the Holy Trinity of contracts - Sabathia, A-Rod and Tex - march into the void. Of the three, Tex is likely to have a baseball life after the Yankees. And he's first to go on Hal's shitlist. He is in his contract year, which Gammonites say - (disrespectfully, if you think about it) - means he'll do well.

So what if he does? What if he hits 30 HR, bats .254 and drives in 100? We're paying him $23 million per year. Would we bring him back? (He'll probably demand a three year deal.) Would we go another year older in 2017? Or do we let a popular, arguably great Yankee go elsewhere? What if this is Tex's year?

A concern Yankee fans never had until Hal inherited the team.

4 comments:

Local Bargain Jerk said...


I'm not sure why this kind of thing needs to be anything other than an arms-length business transaction:

1) The Yanks should offer him a 2-year contract at $4MM per.

2) The salary becomes half that number in any given year if he fails to appear in 135 games in that same year. (Appear = "available to start". If the Yanks bench him, that doesn't count against his games.)

3) The team holds an option to bring him back for a 3rd year for $5MM, on the same minimum games played terms.

4) We can dick around with the salary numbers stated in #1 and #3, but that's the concept, Mark, whaddya say?

If Tex wants to finish his career in pinstripes, the above is how he can do it. If this doesn't work for him, he can still play for five more years and he should instruct his agent to find a contract/situation that is more to his liking.

What am I missing?


el duque said...

If only it could be that way. Makes sense, eh?

But if Tex has a good year, he'll get a lot more from somebody else. Hal hates auctions.

Alphonso said...

Then, we can call him T-Rod. The player who never leaves and bleeds us dry.

On the other hand, it's not as though we have some super star prospect, waiting in the wings. And don't give me the Bird as your retort.

He can't get out of his car without hurting himself. And a full year ( plus ) away from the game? He'll have to start again in the Florida league.

Alphonso said...

I'm with LBJ. Why dos you sound so rational?