While Team USA toyed with a tomato can, the Yankees unveiled Cam Schlittler

On the most obscure night yet for the '26 Yankees - while Team USA was punishing a concoction of players apparently drawn together by the 1985 Terry Gilliam movie, "Brazil" - the Yankees uncorked Cam Schlittler, their most critical pitcher this spring. 

Every hopeful prediction for the 2026 Yankees is framed by three keys: 

1. Aaron Judge stays healthy.

2. Gerrit Cole returns. 

3. Cam Schlittler is for real.

If those three happen, the Yanks will challenge in the AL East, selling tickets into September. Come October, as the brain trust loves to assure us, anything can happen. (It just hasn't, for the last 17 years.)

So, last night, Schlittler pitched well enough to set aside our darkest fears, that last fall's extra stresses could impair his upcoming season. 

Last night, we could watch a split-screen buffet: 

The B-squad, featuring the future no-names of Somerset, against the dregs of Tampa.

Or USA's systematic dismantlement of Team Brazil, which should have been playing in Double A. 

From the git-go, when Aaron Judge homered, the World Baseball Classic game was a joke. It was USA bombing Iran. Against a team of MLB all-stars, Brazil trotted out a 17-year-old high school pitcher, a college hurler, a truck driver and a lineup of players past their sell-by dates. 

Listen: I like the WBC, especially with Judge playing. It warms my heart to see Houston fans wearing robes and powdered wigs, and even to see Alex Bregman, for a change, cheating for our side. Last night, as Judge rounded the bases, it reminded me of how lucky Yank fans are: On a nightly basis, we watch the greatest slugger of modern times. It's nice to share him with the world.

But why kid ourselves: Brazil? Great Britain? The Netherlands? Czechia? What about Madagascar? This so-called "Classic" is crapola. Globally, three teams, maybe four - USA, Japan, Dominican Republic and maybe Mexico? - stand above the rest. You could make a case for an eight-team tourney. But twenty? Ridiculous. Last night, it was Lions v Christians, and - frankly - any HR hit by Judge is just one that doesn't matter, and I'd prefer to see them helping the Yankees. 

So, the usual takeaways:

1. Spencer Jones and the Martian did not play in the Yankee game. Donno why. You might think one of the benefits of losing 11 players to the WBC is more playing time for Dominguez and Jones. Oh, well... 

2. Schlittler's line. Two innings. No runs. Four Ks. Fingers crossed. 

3. Ben Rice played 1B and went 1-2. He's now 7 for 17 - .412 - this spring. Of all the Yankees, I believe Rice is our greatest hope to break out as a star in 2026.

4. Oswaldo Cabrera finally played into a game. Nice ovation. He walked and scored. Played SS. Not since Didi Gregorius has a player smiled his way into the Yankee fan base. Everybody loves Oswaldo. I really hope he gets a shot.