Looking for meaning in a meaningless box score: 10 takeaways

 1. Spencer Jones hit another one. In seven plate appearances this spring, he is:

HR. K. K. BB. K. K. HR. 

At this pace - (with, say, 55 ABs) - he'd finish spring training with 16 HRs and 32 Ks. Joey Gallo lives.

2. Jazz and Goldy also homered. The Yankees scored four of their seven runs via the long ball. Yep, it's last year's team, all right.

3. Looking at the number of Yankees headed to the World Baseball Classic, who does not fear the looming injuries? It's almost as if we'll experience a "before" and "after" spring.

4. Yesterday's Yankee offensive explosion dims when you notice who was pitching: Carlos Carrasco, chasing yet another comeback.

5. Another ex-Yank, Ben Gamel, homered for Atlanta. Once upon a time, he was the International League MVP. Those were the days.

6. Today's controversy - an A.I. doctored video, forwarded by the White House, shows (falsely) a U.S. hockey player mocking Canada. It's an ugly side of what's to come. 

7. Yankees keep up the happy talk about Giancarlo Stanton, but the poor guy says he can't even open a bag of chips, so sore are his elbows. If a man cannot open a bag of chips - assuming he does not have access to cans of Pringle's - how can he live a meaningful life? 

8. Cam Schlittler faced five batters yesterday, his first test since being held back two weeks ago. The Yankees are gushing happy talk. But it's the next few days, when he might experience pain, that matter. 

9. Oswaldo might get into a game late next week. He's still recovering from that catastrophic broken ankle. Some images you can never forget. The surreal bend of that foot is one.

10. Jasson Dominguez didn't play yesterday. With the Yankees signing OF Randal Grichuk, the Martian is almost a certainty to start the year in Scranton. I wonder where his head is at. It can't be good.

Dumpster Diving Diva – UPDATE

 

Hey - I don't normally post things twice in one day but in this case I just had to.

I decided to call that number on the sign: 

(555) 666-7777

to see what would happen.  

It connected through to an open line where I swear that I could hear HAL and PAL 

making the kinds noises that one would only hear in their worst nightmares.

After listening in for about five minutes I yelled, 

"THAT'S REPULSIVE AND DISGUSTING!"

into the uh, like you know . . . the telephone's mouthpiece

and suddenly all the sound stopped.  

After a second or two of silence they both broke out into this weird

burst of screechy giggling. 

That was it.  

I hung up.

My advise to everyone out there is whatever you do . . .

DO NOT CALL THAT NUMBER !

Thanks and have a pleasant Thursday evening.

The Yankees should start retiring letters of the alphabet

 That's it. That's all I gots ta say.

Enough Already!

JM just wrote with displeasure about CC Sabathia getting his number retired and while I didn't agree with all his conclusions about the players on the list of retired numbers, he is 100% correct that the retiring of numbers is totally out of hand and has become so prevalent as to render it meaningless. 

It's all about marketing now. 

They should just do more bobbleheads. The springs on them don't work anyway so how about little statues? They could do it like the ones of the Legion of Super Heroes at the Superman Museum. If Bouncing Boy can get one so can CC Sabathia but he shouldn't have his number retired. 

That said, I respect CC. I do. Mostly because of this... 

He was just shy of a half million dollar inning bonus and got tossed from the game. As it turns out the Yankees gave it to him anyway but major props for being a great teammate! 

At other times not so much... 

An inability to control weight and alcohol consumption led to five sub par seasons and one big no show. His overall career is Hall of Fame worthy. His time as a Yankee... Nah.  

Which takes me back to who should have their numbers retired based on what they did as YANKEES. Here is the list again. (Thanks JM).

I'm good with 1-10 except Maris. Six years with the club two VERY GOOD years one of which is legendary. Those Yankees were a machine and he was a key cog but they would have done well with out him. 

The opposite is true for Thurm. JM was iffy on Munson. I say yes because even though he also had only a couple of really good years he was the heart and soul of the Yankees and the return to being champions after a long long drought. Pivotal player. True Yankee legend.   

Jorge and Paulie?  I don't know. Maybe because my fandom extends over 60 years. If I was born in 1980 they would be a yes. Key players in a great era but you will notice that a lot of key players from the 20's and the 30's do not have their numbers retired so this smells like marketing to me.  

More Karate Kid and Mad Eater Lad than Cosmic Boy and Lightning Lad. if you know what I mean.  

JM said no to Mattingly. I totally disagree . Donnie Baseball? Give it to him. 

Reggie? Hall of Fame YES! Retired number? No. In his picture on the Baseball Reference page he is wearing an A's cap. 

Andy and  Ron...  Well why should Whitey be the only starter but... ah what the hell. Sure. They were great Yankee pitchers. At least they won titles. 

I'd give it to Bernie only because he got jobbed out of being Core Four because nothing cool rhymed with five.  

Mariano is a no doubter. Which leaves CC...

No.  Unlike all, and I do mean all, of the above, well except Donnie :(, when I think of CC I don't think about how good he was and the championship. I think of all of the disappointment.  He deserves the Hall of Fame based on his entire body of work but not his number retired as a Yankee. 

When men were men, and box scores were box scores

 

Cashman continues to be our Dumpster Diving Diva !

A wee bit of Bitty / Above Average Collaboration

With the signing of Randal Grichuk, the Yankees bring an official end to the Jasson Dominguez era

Open the Canyon of Heroes. Call out Mayor Mam! Rejoice! 

For six years, we've awaited the arrival of Jasson Dominguez, The Martian, the future star who would usher in a golden Yankee era, led by the greatest outfield in baseball. And today, we have an outcome:

Randal Grichuk.

 The Yankees are said to be signing the 34-year-old OF/DH - entering his 13th season, after he hit .228 last year. 

He'll platoon as a righty bat, likely replacing Trent Grisham against tough lefties, while Clay Bellinger plays center.

The Yankee brain trust - carefully avoiding big ticket stars - will spice last year's returning lineup with platoons at 1B, 3B, LF and CF. (Strangely, they still only employ LH catchers. and RH shortstops. Roster moves ahead?)

For Yank fans, the news of landing Grichuk brings the realization that Brian Cashman was not blowing smoke last week, when he suggested that Jasson Dominguez will start the year at Scranton. The addition of Grichuk means the Martian might just finish the year there, too. (Or more likely, he will be traded.)

At least through April, or until key Yankees fall to injuries, the Scranton outfield should look quite intriguing: Dominguez in LF, the much-hyped slugger Spencer Jones in CF, and the 23-year-old, scrap heap pickup, Yanquiel Fernandez in RF, (who two years ago was Colorado's big-hyped version of The Martian.) 

I don't mean to mock Grichuk, a serviceable MLB outfielder in this millennium. But for six years, Yank fans have been encouraged to follow Dominguez, and last season, he didn't look that terrible. He's fast. He can steal bases. He's only 22. And now... Randal Grichuk?

Somehow, I cannot escape the sense that these minor pickups, these existential scrap yard acquisitions, are the product of A.I. Using computer models, the Yankees plan to nickel-and-dime their way to the AL wild card, and then get lucky in the playoffs. It's a cynical strategy, and it robs us of one of the great joys of rooting for a team: Watching youngsters grow. 

With Dominguez, maybe it was always just hype. Maybe we're better off dealing with it now. But The Martian is going to leave soon, and he probably won't come back. 

And we have Randal Grichuk. 

Fuck, let's just retire all the numbers

I guess, perhaps unfairly, I remember CC's failings more than his heroics since they happened more recently. Kind of the same way I remember David Wells for being a hard-drinking, overweight guy who wrecked his back and couldn't pitch when we really needed him to.

Yes, I can be a real dick sometimes.

CC was really good with flashes of total dominance during his 11 years in pinstripes. His record was 134-88, with 1700 strikeouts and a 3.81 ERA. Swell. I'm impressed. I get it.

Maybe the number of numbers that have been retired have just soured me on the whole idea. Too. Many. Numbers. Simple as that. It's just not so special anymore. Ruth, Mantle, Berra, DiMag...no arguing those. But let's look at the full list of retired numerals.

Right off the bat (nyuk nyuk), no Billy Martin. No way. Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Mantle, Berra, all yes. I wouldn't put Torre up there. Sorry, I still think he was the luckiest man in baseball.

Maris? No. Too short a stay, though momentous in '61. Rizzuto? I'm torn. No Munson. A tragic end, but no.

Like the Hall of Fame, retired numbers should be for giants of the game. Not guys who were just really good, or were Yankees for one stop along their careers.

I take away O'Neill, Posada, and sadly, Mattingly. Another sad story, not a giant.

Rivera, yes, definitely, and he and maybe (maybe) Jeter should be the lone reps from those late-'90s teams.

Petitte? Borderline. Reggie? One stop along his way, but one momentous, giant-like achievement while here.

Not Bernie. Probably Stengel, though I could be talked out of it. He worked with amazing rosters where it was hard to go wrong (shades of Torre).

Whitey? Sure. Gator? Maybe not. Ellie? Same.

At this point, to be honest, I'm not exactly sure where the bar is for this honor. The list as it stands is really confusing, at least for me.

Maybe we should just start putting letters on the uniforms. A, B, C. When we run out, just duplicate them, like AA, BB. Maybe A1, the stake sauce number, A2, and so on. When we get to V2, maybe we should skip that one.

If we put every guy whoever won a warm spot in our hearts while they were with the Yanks, then everyone there can stay, and I also nominate Rocky Colavito, Nick Swisher, Steve Hamilton, Lindey McDaniel, Fritz Peterson and Mike Kekich (as a pair), and Kevin Maas.

Okay, maybe not Maas.

The state of the Yankees is all about Will Warren being Will Warren.

Come back, O' meaningfulness of spring...

We long for box scores that tell us what the hell happened and, maybe, what the hell is coming...

What we see is the form-fitting black box known as Will Warren.

Yesterday, he pitched into the third, gave up a run, fanned four. By most respects, a typical Will Warren impersonation of Will Warren, reading from the book of Will Warren - (abridged, of course) - with an introduction by Will Warren.

Not bad. Not great. Vintage Will Warren. 

Here's what happened...

First Inning: Strikeout. Triple. Single (run scores.) Line out. Strikeout.

Second inning: Single. Infield hit. Fly out. Strikeout. Fly out.

Third Inning: Fly out. Strikeout.  

And Boone brings the hook.

Overall, a descent Will Warren outing. In fact, if you're following Will Warren, you gotta at least give the guy the second meaningless batter of the first meaningless inning of the first meaningless exhibition game of 2026. 

If Will Warren can be the Yankees' fifth starter, devouring the innings that a fifth starter needs to consume, he could reduce the pressure on Luis Gil and Cam Schlittler, who is already missing time. He won't become an ace. He won't become a liability. 

And that, comrades, is what Will Warren does.

Last year, he threw 162 innings, went 9-8 with an ERA of 4.44. Meh, you say.

He's 26, which is young for anybody from Branson, Missouri. 

Among starters, Warren is an old-school outlier. He pitched four years in college. (Most hot prospects jump after their junior years, when they have more contractual leverage.) Then he pitched three seasons in the Yankee minor leagues, level by level, slog by slog, slowly making his way to NYC. 

If he can improve in 2026 - that is, if Will Warren can be Will Warren - the Yankee rotation can survive until Gerrit Cole, Carlos Rondon and that 6'7" rookie who throws 103 mph can come around. 

We talk about the rookies and the role players. Will Warren is entering his arbitration year. He needs to be Will Warren. 

The Yankees have changed in subtle ways. It's still unclear whether the changes are for the better

And so it goes...  

The Yankees, still tiptoeing through feces in the George M. Steinbrenner Wastewater Treatment Facility, are awaiting answers from a winter of being frozen into place.

None will come soon. The wisdom behind standing pat - of bringing back last year's team, warts and all - won't be discerned for at least three months. 

But there are subtle changes within the matrix.

Spencer Jones homered in his first game, boosting hopes throughout the Yankiverse. Since then, he has failed to put a ball into play. Four strikeouts. One walk. 

He's unveiled a new toe-tap swing, developed over the winter and modeled after Ohtani. It's too soon to gauge success or failure. And it's worth remembering that last year, right around now, Jones trotted out another remodeled swing, and we were drooling with hope. 

We should not count out Jones. For starters, he shows the existential self-awareness to try and change. That he's trying new stances means that he knows the problem - he goddam strikes out too much - and he's adjusting. This is his life. Unless he changes, the Ks will kill his career. Lou Pinella used to say baseball was all about adjustments - pitchers, to the batters, and vice-versa. Well, Jones is trying. It can't happen in a week. Let's give him space. And let's keep him.

Jasson Dominguez is 2 for 5 with three strikeouts and a walk. Not bad. What's troubling, though, is the sense that he still looks naked and afraid in LF. 

Why is that? He's had a whole winter to shag fly balls. All he needed was somebody to hit fungoes, maybe 100 a day? and he should be approaching decency in the outfield. If he's still a defensive liability, the Yankees have the right to wonder. WTF?

It's clear now that, unless somebody gets injured, Dominguez will start the season at Scranton. That's because he cannot be trusted in the outfield. 

What an indictment of the Yankee farm system. And maybe of The Martian himself.

Ben Rice might yet be the Yankee hope. He is 2-for-3, and - as far as I can tell - he has not changed his stance or sit on the couch all winter. Already, he looks much more comfortable at 1B. 

Whatever he did this winter, it seems to have worked.

And so it goes.

Searching for meaning in a meaningless universe

Yesterday, as snow obliterated the homeland, the stand-pat Death Barge succumbed to the newly transmogrified Mets. 

Meaningless.

Ten gossamer thoughts:

1. The brain trust touted the works of Luis Gil and Cade Winquest, the Rule 5 pickup, but neither managed a scoreless outing against a lineup of farm show tool bits. The bar is low.

2. Nobody pitched lights out. Even Tim Hill gave up two hits, and Brendon Beck, punctuating the loss, was kicked around quite handily. 

3. Jose Caballero homered. Go figure. Last year, he slugged five. He turns 30 in August. SS is his for the taking. It's now or never.

4. Finishing at SS was 25-year-old Jonathan Ornelas, who kicked around last year between Texas and Atlanta. In a 32-game MLB career, he's hit .208. 

5. Neither Spencer Jones nor The Martian played. No prob. Game didn't matter. Still, we gotta see what they can do. To sit them is to punch their tickets to Scranton. 

6. OF Kenedy Corona, 25, is the early front runner for the James P. Dawson Best Rookie in Yankee Camp award, the most overlooked award in the history of sports. In his first game, Corona's diving catch quashed a rally. Yesterday, he homered. He could win a watch.

7. Mets played Benge, Bae, Suero, Arroyo, Reimer, Clifford, Schwartz... who are these people? 

8. In early January, John Sterling had a heart attack. It's been at least six weeks. Why was the world not notified? (And best wishes for a full recovery.)

9. Can't help but feel sorry for the Canadian hockey team. The U.S. has alternatives - Super Bowl, pro wrestling, game shows, Hollywood awards... Canada has hockey. 

10. Today, under two feet of snow, we are all Canadians.

No

 [Link to story]

 

Yanks experience their biggest s**t show since Game 5 of the 2024 World Series. And it's the real stuff.

Ever stress out over what seem to be colossal concerns, only to have a new problem suddenly put everything into place?

Here's a tidbit from Yankee camp, via The Athletic/NY Times.

Yeahp. A sewer line backed up, sending Major League crapola - the real deal, not a metaphor - to roam the George M Steinbrenner baseball complex in Tampa. Suddenly, for at least one day, all our bullpen worries vanished into the brown. Reports The Athletic:

A Yankees player said the sewage had initially soaked only the bathroom, but later it had begun to reach other areas of the clubhouse, which is mostly carpeted. Players often leave belongings, such as footwear and equipment, on the carpet.

“It’s a mess in there,” he said.

Yeahp. It's carpeted. 

I leave you to your thoughts.

It's tempting to call it an omen, a sign of what's to come. But while players sought to rescue their iPads, a few Yanks enjoyed a different kind of blowout. 

In a (thankfully) outdoor game, the Yankees scored 20 runs. against Detroit.

Once again, Spencer Jones is off to a hot start. He homered yesterday, a 408-foot shot to right, while playing CF and going 1-for-3 with a strikeout (his bugaboo.) What if Jones goes on a tear, forcing himself into the lineup? For him to get playing time in April, it would require at least two outfielders to go down with injuries. (Even then, they'd probably play cheap and hold him in Scranton, out of contract considerations.) Still, all the guy can do is keep hitting. He was the most intriguing prospect in the Yankee farm system last year. A few more HRs, and he'll be the most intriguing one in camp.

Aaron Judge hit two HRs, and three minor leaguers added one-offs. The biggest name (after Jones) would be Roderick Arias, a big ticket, high-profile Latino signee five years ago, whose career has been a bust. He went 2-for-3 with 4 RBIs. For all his issues - basically, he's never hit - Arias is still only 21, too young to be discarded. If he were to suddenly bloom, like red tide near a sewer output, the Yankees would have a trade surplus at SS, and I think Cashman would be frantic to make a deal, while his good fortune lasts.  

FWIW: The Martian went 1 for 1 with a walk and two runs scored. Another guy whose immediate future hinges on the health of the outfield.

Too bad nothing mattered. But yesterday, the Yankees faced a different kind of matter: 

Fecal matter. 

You could sign a decent bullpen arm for that

 

RIP, Maz

 

He was all glove, no hit, and finally got into the Hall, anyway. But he did hit the seventh game, bottom of the ninth home run in the 1960 Series that made Mantle weep in front of his locker.

Mazeroski said that saving 1,000 runs with your glove was just as good as knocking in 1,000 runs at the plate. He may have had something there.

Though, being a Yankees fan, I think it would be great if you could do both. But that's probably asking too much.

From Elmer to the Coleman boys, the first nothingness is in the books

Now and then, on days like this, we should remind ourselves that a win in late February is just as important as a win in early March.

Which is to say that both are steaming dregs of meaninglessness, sold to sunbaked snowbirds as they brown-up their precancerous pigmentations, featuring names that shalt be whispered once in the Yankiverse and then never heard again.

Let's consider the half-dozen glitches in the Matrix who pitched for the Yankees, in game one of the Grapefruit season.

Elmer Cruz Rodriguez, also known as Elmer Rodriguez, is one of the buzz boys of camp. He's 22, 6'3", hails from our 51st state (Venezuela) and came to the Yankees in what has been, thus far, a hideously lopsided trade. Two years ago, Brian Cashman traded Cruz-Rodriguez, Rodriguez - Elmer - to Boston for Carlos Naevez, a fine young catcher. As a result, the Yankee front office has an existential reason to promote, uh, Elmer, and we must consider the desire for Cashman to have this guy succeed. 

Yesterday, Elmer succeeded, sorta. He threw three scoreless innings, though not without help from a broken bat DP grounder and a magnificent diving catch in the outfield by Kenedy Corona, a fellow Venezuelan who sounds like a beer, but who is, in fact, a 25-year-old, glove-first farm urchin. If Corona doesn't make that catch, Elmer's first appearance would look entirely different. But it still wouldn't matter.

Jake Bird, the 30-year-old bust from last July's trade deadline, who collapsed so gloriously that, after being demoted to Scranton, he still couldn't get anybody out. This is another pitcher that Cashman acquired, and thus the brain trust will make sure he gets ample opportunities. He threw a scoreless inning.

 Kervin Castro, 27, another Venezuelan - sensing a trend? - who pitched a one-two-three inning. Once upon a time, at age 15, Castro supposedly hit 88 mph on the radar gun, then signed with the Giants for more money than you'll make in five years. He missed two seasons with Tommy John. He's a longshot.

Bradely Hanner, 27, who gave up a 2-run HR to Pete Alonso, the only scoring in the game. Last year, he pitched 49 innings at Triple A, with an ERA of 4.74. A righty. 

Carson Coleman, 27, of Lexington, Kentucky, winner of the Zolio Almonte Award for the star of the first game of spring. He fanned three batters in one inning, stamping his ticket for at least another outing. He's a Yankee farmhand who missed all of 2023 due to Tommy John, and who was returned to the franchise after being selected by the Rangers in the 2024 Rule 5 draft. You can't do much better than striking out the side. Interesting.

Dylan Coleman, 29, a 6'5" cog who threw a scoreless inning but gave up a hit, against the No-Names of Nobodyville. He's bounced around for 10 years. Hey, you never know.

Meaningless to us. But not to the pitchers and their scrapbook-keeping moms. O, the vagaries of February!

And so it begins, the 2026 exhibition season...

Get ready, everybody. 

The year's most meaningless game,  - a fraudulent pageant of nothingness, and a showcase to Greg Bird, Zolio Almonte, Jackson Melian and countless others - happens today in the toxic MAGA swamps of Sarasota.

The spring training opener. 

Aaron Judge won't make it. You don't compel a 6'7" giant to ride on a bus for 90 minutes. Same with Giancarlo, Oswaldo, and others. Among the pitchers to go are Elmer Rodriguez and Carlos Lagrange, the Hollywood "It" Girls of camp thus far. Whatever they do will be celebrated or mourned, and none of it will matter a single, solitary whit.

Here's what happened last year. The Yankees beat Tampa, 4-0, with Marcus Stroman getting the "win." (Fun fact: 

The Markster recorded three other wins in 2025.)

So, why bother? Honestly, I have no choice. It's molecular. Baseball is Pavlov. I am his poodle. We bark and bluster all winter. We condemn Prince Hal. We blast Cashman and his groveling gum-chewer, the Bane of Boone. We vow to quit. There are birds to watch, stamps to collect, TV news shows... Then comes the pop of a mitt, the crack of a bat, the sight of a millionaire pitcher jogging the outfield, and we follow the scent like a glue-sniffing frat hobo.

Tomorrow will bring us a box score. 

No redactions.

Here we go.