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Saturday, April 28, 2012

Open letter to Seattle: Eff you you effing effs

Dear Seattlittes and Seattletonians,

As you may have heard, between the rain storms, we of the Yankiverse are not exactly tickled with the outcome of the Michael Pineda trade. The anger expressed toward Brian Cashman back here is at the level you'd expect to hear about Obama from the guests in a Hannity green room.

But from this vantage point, we have to concede the poor fool one measily point: He has never claimed you hid anything from us in that unspeakably disastrous deal. Cashman has absorbed the full nuclear brunt of that mistake. He has said this over and over. His bad. Not yours.

But, good grief, so now you're accusing Cashman of doing just that - secretly - in code, sort of the way that Lyndon Larouche speaks to gay Mormons. Says your U.S.S. Mariner blog (great name for a blog, BTW):

The Yankees believe the Mariners screwed them in the Pineda deal, or, at the very least, they suspect it and want everyone to know...

I’m going to quote a lot from one Espn article, because you’ll see how the Yankee story and their approach is coming together a week later.

“This is a massive decision gone wrong right now,” Cashman told ESPNNewYork.com on Friday. “So all scrutiny is fair.”

Gone wrong? Why put it like this? If trading for Pineda was the correct decision, knowing the health risks of pitchers, then the outcome is bad, but the decision would still be good.


You know what I say to this?

Eff you, you effing effs.

Listenup, Seattle. You took us, OK? Fair and square. Hooray for you. But how about sparing us your lie-detector parsing of the quotes crapola.

We'll deal with Cashman. He's in our penalty box. But if you want to scour every comment for a sign that somebody is impugning your great integrity, go screw a glacier, because as far as I'm concerned, it just suggests that you think you have something to prove about your integrity. 

Want to take a victory lap? Fine. Knock yourself out. But spare us your truth-interpretations and your outrage - OUTRAGE! - that somebody would suggest your integrity was less than pure.

All is fair in baseball trades. We know that. The Yankees ran their medical tests on Pineda. He checked out. Nobody says you lied. But you can't have it both ways. You can't win the trade in such a lopsided fashion and then claim, OMG! you've been unfairly tarred! - unless you secretly suspect there's something to it. And if you do... eff you you effing effs.

1 comment:

Alphonso said...

Actually, I was always certain that Seattle knew exactly what was going down with Pineda. Otherwise, they would never, read that as NEVER, traded a young, stud pitcher.

I will also tell you ( I already did, in my post-trade rant months ago ) that the "hot prospect" they threw in ( or should I say that Cashman skillfully bartered away for Hector Noesi ?) has absolutely no chance at being an impact pitcher at the major league level.

He is, today, less of a prospect than is Brien Taylor.