Kevin Baker's book is here!

Kevin Baker's book is here!
"... an exemplary sports book..." Kirkus Reviews

Wednesday, April 18, 2012

The Obvious Danger

Before I ruin your week and likely your season, let me observe a few realities;


1. Clearly, the world is already a better place now that "Ju-Ju Rules" is available in book stores, on-line, and in the back flaps of all coach seats on Delta Airlines flights into Boston. And those vignettes on the implementation of various Ju-Ju rules are beginning to appear on tv's installed for your pleasure in the back seats of NYC taxis.

2. I wish that I could be at the " Ju-Ju Rules" book signing today at that sports bar in
Oswego ( rumor has it that noted author and Pulitzer Prize candidate for 2012 in fiction, Hart Seely, will be on site with feathered pen).

First of all, I have a good friend who lives there ( a fellow ice-fisherman who makes a killer goulash ). And no one ever goes there to visit him in Oswego.

Secondly, a sports bar in Oswego is a rarity for anyone. The booze, burgers and other trash food are ( I am told ) amazing. It will be like the all-american "hot-stove" jam session on baseball ( read; the Yankees ), and likely go on all night. I would either need to spend the night in a flop house or have a designated driver to get me back somewhere. And there are no designated drivers in Oswego as far as I know.

Unfortunately, I have tickets to " Book of Mormon" ( and the after party ) and can't make it to Oswego tonight.

OK. Now for the demons and evil portion of this message:

Many of you know that the Yankees travel to Boston this weekend. In our absence, the stinking red socks and their degenerate fans have been failing at every turn. Bobby V has already alienated our favorite bean ball target ( ok; brush-back target). Their all star center fielder has tweaked a shoulder and is out for a few games. Their raid of Yankee prospect Marc Melancon has begun to show signs of failure ( 45+ ERA at the end of yesterday's outing ).

So all is well in Yankee land. We love these troubles to befall Boston.

However; I suggest we cancel the trip. This is a set-up for Boston's resurgence. All they need is to sweep us; to beat MO on two save appearances; for Josh Beckett to pitch a one-hitter; for their rookie CF replacement to have a break-out series.....I think you know where this is heading. We do this all the time; we give a slumping Big Pappy a 4 HR week-end and he goes on from there; we strike out 10 straight times, giving their bullpen confidence they never had before.

This is the season for us and for them. We cannot let them regain breath into their collapsing franchise lungs.

I hate this series for what it might do.




5 comments:

el duque said...

Trap series.

We should send Scranton to play them.

bennyboy said...

I have confidence. I think we take two out of three. Cano hits his first home run, and Jeter continues defying the Lord of Time.

Then, after we all declare Boston's season "done," we watch the next 100 games and Boston ends up as a wild card. We all forget that these April games happened.

Joe De Pastry said...

Bobby V will order his pitchers to beanball Jeter and order his hitters to keep bunting until A-Fraud sprains something. Then we will have Nunez and Chavez playing SS and 3B for the rest of the season or until we trade Phelps and two other prospects for Marco Scutaro or Miguel Cairo.

Stang said...

In games Miguel Cairo played as a Yankee, the team's winning percentage is .615.

BernBabyBern said...

... and the 38.5% of games the Yankees lost when he was there weren't Miggy's fault.