Inspired by all you It Is Highers, I went out and recruited a shortstop to finish this team.
MLB All-Scaredy-Cat Haunted-House Team
1B Boo Powell
2B Spook Jacobs
SS Pee Wee Shriek
3B Joe Panik
LF Chilli Davis
CF Startle Marte
RF Enos Slaughter
C Dan Howley
LHP Mac Scarce, Frights Peterson
RHP Kendall Graveman, Urban Shocker
MGR Dave Trembley
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13 comments:
"Full Moon Odom," a comment on the first Halloween post, takes the cake.
I still like Duque's "Thurman Manson' for sheer terror.
If you're looking for something lighter Thurman Munster is pretty funny.
This is more cerebrally terrifying, like Hitchcock. Or Connecticut.
Ike -
I know. I just wanted to type Thurman Munster.
Connecticut is VERY scary. First of all it has CUT right there in the name. Secondly, all the women there own horses or boats. Freaks me right out.
Scariest of all is the "Manfred" Man. Ruining baseball as we know it. He will eat your heart out, one season at a time.
My favorite is still Doug's "Carl Pavano—that's scary enough."
All that Seagar guy has done today is hit another home run—no game-saving play in the field. What a bum. Cashman was right to pass on him.
Are the baseball gods truly out to get us?
What have we done to piss them off this badly?
First Montgomery, then Eovaldi.
Now Heaney? I mean, seriously, Heaney?!?!? The guy whose ERA for any team was not even close to his time with the Yankees?
We are doomed.
I know he only had a cup of coffee here, but still, this parade is embarrassing.
And these three guys are on the verge of getting a ring.
Fuck.
If that wasn’t bad enough, Chapman is in line to get his second ring.
Fuck you Hal and a special fuck you to our very own Intern, who still swears he’s a major league General Manager
Think about it: Chapman spit the bit here with stunning regularity and yet he got a ring with the Cubs after a hundred years of drought that made the Dust Bowl look like a dry summer, and now he’s on the verge of getting a ring for the first time in Texas Ranger history.
I ask you: what did we do to deserve this humiliation?!?!?
A perfect Halloween Horror Show.
How can Cashman still be employed by the NY Yankees? Eovaldi, Monty, Heaney and Chapman, all contributing (shakily in Chapman's case) to an American League pennant winner's World Series success. A starker example of his ineptitude and incompetence is not possible.
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