Saturday, February 3, 2024

Until Blake Snell signs with someone else, he still holds the key to the Yankees' 2024 season

Breaking news: Keynan Middleton has signed with St. Louis, joining Wandering Wandy Peralta in leaving the Yankees, as they enter 2024.

But but BUT... am I being excessively harsh on our heroes? Certainly, the Yankees can overtake Baltimore and win the AL East if only...

... Carlos Rodon somehow returns to 2022 form.

... Giancarlo Stanton hits like it's 2019.

... Nestor Cortes finds his fastball from 2021.

... Anthony Rizzo comes back from his concussion.

... Aaron Judge stays healthy.

... Gerrit Cole repeats his Cy Young season.

... Anthony Volpe learns to hit.

... Alex Verdugo has a career year.

... Juan Soto turns out to be as hyped.

... DJ LeMahieu returns tos 2020 form.

... And a pile of other "ifs" go our way. 

Yeah, I take it back. If everything goes right, we'll be fine. 

We certainly don't need no Blake Snell - nope, nobody - not when we got that Clayton Beeter.

(Note to Mr. Steinbrenner:

(Sir, please don't be discouraged by the Orioles' paltry selling price of $1.7 billion. That's just Baltimore. Everything costs less there. I bet you could get $10 billion for the Yankees. Ten billion! Think of the horses you could buy. You could win the  Kentucky Derby. Or, a super yacht, based on your own private island. You could hold big parties with supermodels, TV stars and members of the royal family. You could be a great humanitarian, celebrated at the Met Gala, dating a Kardashian and presenting at the Golden Globes.

(Sir, you do not need to go through life being picked on by lowlife Yankee fans. You can have it all! Ten billion dollars. Don't be afraid to dream. Just sayin...)

15 comments:

13bit said...

Sigh…

Celerino Sanchez said...

The key to a Yugo?

JM said...

I just read an article from Thursday on mlb.com that has us as done in the free-agent market, with a starting five of Cole, Rondon, Stroman, Cortes and Schmidt. Snell is in the rearview. The infield is considered set with DJ at third and Rizzo "feeling great" these days. And Verdugo, Judge and Soto in the outfield. Judge is said to be happy about playing center. Trevino catching with Wells as backup. Holmes closing, with a bullpen acquisition still possible.

Your 2024 New York Yankees, ladies and gentlemen. Which, aside from Soto, Verdugo and so-so Stroman, is pretty much the 2023 New York Yankees, minus Higgy and King. And I'm afraid that last one is gonna hurt.

We're treading water, maybe getting a couple of backstrokes in with Soto's bat (but paying for them with his glove).

AboveAverage said...

Why is everyone bellyaching?

84 Wins is nothing to double over with intestinal cramps, lose your footing and fall down the steps of the express escalator to hell over, is it?

IS IT? *

*(whilst y’all are ponder that question I present you with the following lyrics, translated from the winning 2011 Bulgarian Boys Marching Band competition, held in Sofia in April of that year.)

Clean as a whistle

Marching through the thistle

Impress her with your missile

As you pound that grizzle

Like a hammer and a chisel

Yeah!

BTR999 said...

That’s a whole lotta ifs.Too many in fact.

I do believe the roster is set. There could be a veteran reliever added, if someone’s price falls, and more scrap heap adds to Scranton for sure. But otherwise this is it, and it ain’t enough.

Rufus T. Firefly said...

"If"

If my grandma had wheels, she'd be a bus.

If Ca$hole had balls, he'd be a much better GM.

AboveAverage said...

I’m curious Rufus, why a bus?

Why not a tricycle or, or maybe an ice cream vendor’s hand truck?



edb said...

Duque, Hal only cares about the salary cap, pocketing alot of the profits and whining about how much it costs to run a New York team. Snell is not coming to the Yankees. Alot of Cashman's dumpster dive pickups are on the way.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Perhaps his worst off-season yet, which is saying something. But just wait until next year when Soto, noticing how things are going, takes off for the West Coast again.

Stick a fork in it—this dynasty is done.

Doug K. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Doug K. said...


"A Dynasty of Suckatude" and other stories.

13bit said...

If I only had a brain...

Kevin said...

What Dynasty?

Of course it could be worse. Remember when Cal Pohlad was the owner of the Twins. Wealthiest owner and cheapest bastard in baseball. Well, he did snag two Rings in his twenty-five years of ownership.... Could we be turning into the Detroit Lions of baseball? Oh noooooooooooo!

Rufus T. Firefly said...

AA

Because trolley is too close to trollop, which grandma was not.

Quite frankly, she was too damn ugly to be a trollop.

Enough of this happy talk.

HAL sucks
Cashie sucks HAL's smegma
Boonie licks Cashie's taint

...and Mickey Mouse is still a rodent that no longer has copyright protection.
I think Fat Freddie's cat is on the prowl for him.

AboveAverage said...

It was the worst of days - it was the end of days - it was the end of the formidable Yankees franchise - Move along - unfortunately there is nothing to see here