Here's mine...
1) The Return of Ronald Reagan
OK not really. That
would be both gross, scary, and not where
I'm at politically. I just want to hear him say, "Mr. Commissioner,
teardown that paywall." and give the
people back their free Yankee games.
2) A Hard Cap
Not on player's salaries. A cap on the number of advertisers viewers/listeners can be exposed to in a given
inning.
I understand that it’s a business, so in-between innings is fine, but enough already.
No more ads on the mound, the bases, the uniforms, the 34th pitch, the first foul ball, first walk, first mound visit, and I never want to hear, “He rounds third and heads for home… and if you’re heading for home for the holidays fly United… he’s out!
Believe me, it’s coming.
3) An ESPN televised
full blown, annual retirement ceremony show
Not to honor the players across all leagues but to finally
get Flo and her crew off the air. Let them offer their tearful goodbyes and
their thanks to the people who made all possible and then disappear... forever.
It’s the only way to stop them.
Toss in the Toyota woman
and could someone please, please, end the Alllstate triumvirate of Jake, Patrick Mahomes,
and, oh hell, anybody that is appearing with them. Please.
Next year we can lose the Geico Gecko and the caveman guy.
Quick Note: I
actually like the actor who plays the caveman. He did a little-known show
called Quick Draw that is available on Hulu. It is a loosely scripted semi-improved
western series about “Sheriff John Henry Hoyle and his reluctant Deputy Eli
introduce the emerging science of forensics to an 1875 Kansas town.” It’s
actually pretty damn funny. I’ve watched it a couple of times.
4) Like 13Bit said …
Lower the damn music!
Or get better speakers and better music. If you want to see
it done right go to Citi Filed. Their music makes it a party. Yankee Stadium
music is an assault.
And last…
5) Add the Golden-At Bat ASAP!
To the pile of horseshit ideas and light it on fire. Stop
trying to make the game what it’s not. Speaking of which, get back to
fundamentals. Hit the cutoff man. Run
out all batted balls. Learn to bunt… oh
and fire Cashman and Boone. I know that the
last one is a given but it can’t be said too many times.
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1 comment:
Fantastic list, Doug! All I want them to keep is the "Mayhem" guy. Though they need better ideas. Now he's one of Santa's elves? Yeah, that's a real insurance threat.
Also, could they bring back, "The Most Interesting Man in the World"? Loved that guy. They could hold open tryouts for the new actor. There would be a mob scene, as pretty much every man in the world considers himself to be that.
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