After barely escaping a home sweep, the Yankees begin their Odyssey

After four months of searching for Ithaca  Binghamton Cortland Syracuse Scranton, this we know about the lotus-eating, siren-chasing, lost-at-sea '26 Yankees. 

1. They cannot manufacture runs. Their offense is entirely Homeric. 

2. Nor are they grinders, who outlast opponents by running up pitch counts. They come to bat swinging, seemingly oblivious to a pitcher's control problems.

3. Without Aaron Judge, they are a sorry team, a tomato can. 

4. Anthony Volpe has exhausted his Yankee karma. He needs to play in another city. 

5. At 23, Jasson Dominguez might someday become a star. But right now, he has no business batting third in the Yankee order. 

6. There is no hope from a lineup with Max Schuemann, a utility infielder, playing RF.

7. Yesterday, against the Dodgers, the Yankee lineup had Dominguez batting third and Schueman in RF. Talk about waving the white flag...

8. Our greatest fear is no longer Scylla (Tampa). It is Charybdis (Boston, now only four behind us in the loss column.) 

9. Anyone who says the Yankees are postseason shoe-ins has not been watching this team over the last month. It is capable of a full-scale epic meltdown. 

10. We are now hearing the five most frightening words in the Yankiverse: Cashman is looking to deal.

May the Gods have mercy on us.

Game Thread - Part Two - July 19th, 202sux

 

They could have been Teammates ∞ Game Thread – 07/19/26

 

Biggest NY sports day of the year? Yamamoto v Schlittler in the afternoon, World Cup in the evening, dueling kitchen sinks at night.

 

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Okay, campers, buckle up, 'cuz here we go: 

It's Judgeless Judgement Day, an epic 10 hours of chips-and-dips, couch-potato, flat-screen flatlining, featuring trad world superpowers in a smoky, doomsday haze of celebrities, testosterone and explosive diarrhea. With Justin Beiber! OMG! Did I mention Beibs? Pinch me! 

At 12:35 p.m., the Yanks and Dodgers launch with Yamamoto v Schlittler, a duel for the ages, if not the afternoon. Let's hope Schlitt throws seven zeros, because the Yankees strikeout machinery won't touch Mr. Moto. There could be a lingering pack-a-day impact from the great Canadian smoke out, and maybe a Jake Bird bullpen meltdown? (If Grisham gets on base, I suggest a pinch runner.) Either way, this game - if not the Yankee season - should be decided by 3 p.m. (Note: During commercials, feel free to switch to the WNBA - LA v Paige Bueckers - or golf; there is always golf, I think Congress passed a law requiring golf.)

Which lets us click to the World Cup finale - Spain v Argentina! - in the Meadowlands, featuring more Canadian smoke, maybe some NY transit flooding and a 40-minute halftime show that will prove to the soccer world, once and for all, that America absolutely ruins everything it touches. Celebrities will be there. Trump will be there. All of Jersey will be there. The whole world will be watching. It will make the Knicks championship look paltry. This should bounce into the evening, even if Trump snores straight through. 

By then, we go back to the LA/NY double-header nightcap, which will either restore the Yankees to a playoffs-worthy dignity or leave them gasping on the dugout floor, swept and smoked. 

If the Yankees split, I suppose we can call it a day and get ready for the Pirates. 

If they get swept, it's an Edmund Fitzgerald Defcon One, and fellas, it's been good to know ya.  

If they get swept, get ready for a tidal wave of spin involving George Lombard Jr. and Clarke Schmidt. But really, why would we care? Since last winter, everyone in the world has known that...

a) Spain was a global FIFA power,
b) the Dodgers were the MLB team to beat
c) You don't mess with Messi. 

Today, on NYC's second biggest venue, it's time for the Yankees to show up. 

If they get swept, well, there's always soccer.

Dreaming of the past whilst disgusted with the present – today's game got "Weathers'ed"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yank fans should start bracing for the worst

John Sterling coined a nickname for Yankee CF Trent Grisham. He called him "Mr. Cool," for the way Grish loped after flies into the gap, snagging them at the last moment and making difficult catches look easy. Grisham's ambling presence conveyed a gracefulness the Yanks have seldom seen in this rather wretched millennium. 

I'm sorta glad The Master didn't have to witness last night's game, which hinged on "Mr. Cool" once again trotting towards an uncertain fate. 

Unfortunately, this time, Grisham wasn't chasing down a liner. He was seeking to score in the 8th inning of 2-1 heartbreaker. 

Grisham was thrown out on split-second relay from a centerfielder who busted his ass from start to finish. Meanwhile, replays showed Grisham stutter-stepping towards second, slowly ramping up towards third and finally reaching home a moment too late. 

"Mr. Cool," indeed.

You live by the lope, you die by the lope.

Once again, the Yankees collapsed in the crosshairs of a quality team. It's becoming their trademark. They squandered not only a chance to close on Tampa - which was swept by Boston - but they crapped on an otherwise great outing by Gerrit Cole, a commodity that looks increasingly finite.  

Once again, the Yankees found themselves on the receiving end of a brutal Dodgers' message: You're not in our league, literally and figuratively. 

Okay, I suppose we should all get a grip. The season didn't end last night. We play LA tonight and Sunday night, two marquee matchups that - when scheduled last winter - were meant to showcase baseball's two greatest sluggers. Nobody anticipated Max Schuemann. But here we are, bent over and waiting for the paddle. 

It's time to start preparing for the worst.

For the first time since April, the Redsocks sit at .500. Every Yank fan in captivity knows what comes next, and we can anticipate it like explosive diarrhea from that contaminated lettuce. 

It's happening again. 

You can feel it.  

Boston spent the last four years growing its farm system, while we systematically traded our future for spare parts, which often didn't even work. Suddenly, they have all the momentum, and we have all the baggage. We're awaiting scans on Aaron Judge, while Giancarlo Stanton can't even open a bag of potato chips, and the very air around us makes us feel like a smoked brisket. 

Live by the lope, die by the lope. 

Start spreading the news. And expect the worst.

Welcome Back–to the–Second Half Game Thread – 07º17º26

  

Here's what the '26 Yankees need to do the job

It can happen here... 

No, I'm not referring to the breakdown of society, leading to civil war and the collapse of democracy. I'm talking about the imminent crack up of the NY Yankees, despite the pathetic AL East, a division of cupcakes and cans of tomato. The Death Star is fluctuating wildly. They bungle eight of 10, then win four straight - (thank you, Washington.) They look warped, like a particle board table that's gone through a carwash. 

The Yankees can still make the playoffs. Hell, everybody can, except KC and the Angels. That's our new reality. But to win this sad division, here's what needs to happen.

1.  Aaron Judge must return in full form. Folks, this aint complicated. Without him, they win doodily-squat. And here's the rub: He might not make it. We should know more this weekend, after he goes through the primordial ooze atomizer. He's probably out through August. Without him, the Yankees are the Savannah Bananas, without the soundtrack. If Judge cannot return, forget the Canyon of Heroes. The Jets have as much a chance.

2. Austin Wells needs to start hitting. Forget the idea that they'll trade for a RH-hitting catcher. Even if Cooperstown Cashman finds a guy, and the trade chips to cut a deal, we still need Wells to hit, say, .230 the rest of the way. (Ten HRs in the second half would give him 15 on the season.) All this trade talk belies the fact that Wells would still start against RH pitchers. The Yankees are stuck with him. He simply has to start hitting. Good luck with that. 

3. Max Fried must return and be a dominant Number Two. He's only 32. He should have some years left. Forget Rodon and Cole: They will win through guile and grease, but neither will ever be the pitcher he once was. Warren and Weathers are cardboard cutouts. We've seen what they've got, and it belongs in the bullpen. Fried could still be a solid starter. He simply must return.

4. They need one solid addition to the bullpen. He doesn't need to be Mason Miller. He doesn't need to be a closer. He just needs to NOT have already pitched in 50 games, and NOT be on the verge of throwing the most innings of his career. He must NOT be the next Camilo Doval or Jake Bird. That's a lotta NOTs.

5. Jazz Chisholm must hit 10 HRs in the second half (which would give him 23 on the season.) If he steals 20 bases, he finishes in the mid-40s. It won't be the 50-50 contractual pot of gold he envisioned last winter. But if he hits, say, .260 over the second half, he can save the bottom of the order and salvage a bidding war next winter, though it will coincide with the labor stoppage.

The Martian? Spencer Jones? Elmer Rodriguez? George Lombard Jr.? Yeah, they'd all be nice. But unless something huge breaks - I'm talking about a catastrophic, roster-clearing deal - we're still stuck in Anthony Volpe's cosmic infundibulum.  The infield doesn't hit, and it throws a lot of short-hop bouncers to first. If Cashman tries to remake the team - well - Tarik Skubal could be the end of time. It can happen here.   

Today in The Athletic

"In a crackdown that has rankled some front offices across the league, Major League Baseball has effectively outlawed the growing practice of using league-provided dugout iPads to access generative artificial intelligence, which some teams had increasingly leaned upon to help shape in-game strategy."

"Oh, geez, are we ever fucked."

Lettuce not forget that Legends Hospitality is also incorporating the use of . . . .

 

AI into it's day to day operations, menu and recipe planning
 

Ranger strikes again

You may have noticed Ranger's comment to Duque's post that likely explains Hal's $3 billion loan.

He also sent me the below, what Chat GPT (or is it GTO?) has to say regarding AI use in baseball. This helps explain why so many decisions seem to fly in the face of what our lying eyes are telling us.

As a final grace note for those wary of AI, this answer to Ranger's question ends with "decision-making," which should not be hyphenated. AI... it's the footure, don't you know.

"Are major league baseball teams using AI for analytics?"

Yes. Today, every Major League Baseball team uses advanced analytics, and many are now incorporating AI and machine learning as part of those systems. AI hasn't replaced traditional baseball analytics—it has expanded what teams can analyze and predict.

Some of the main uses include:

• Player evaluation: AI models analyze thousands of variables from tracking data, scouting reports, biomechanics, and historical performance to project how players will perform or develop.

• Pitch design: Using high-speed cameras and ball-tracking systems such as Hawk-Eye Innovations, teams use AI to identify grip and release changes that can increase spin, movement, or deception.

• Injury prevention: Machine learning analyzes workloads, biomechanics, sleep, recovery, and movement patterns to identify players at higher risk of injury before problems become obvious.

• Game strategy: Teams simulate thousands of game scenarios to optimize defensive positioning, bullpen usage, pinch hitters, stolen-base decisions, and pitch sequencing.

• Player development: AI helps identify subtle mechanical issues in swings and deliveries, allowing coaches to create individualized training plans.

• Scouting: Teams use computer vision to process enormous amounts of video, automatically tagging pitches, swings, defensive plays, and player tendencies that scouts can review more efficiently.

AI works alongside several major data sources, including:

• Pitch velocity, spin rate, and movement

• Exit velocity and launch angle

• Fielder positioning and reaction times

• Biomechanical motion capture

• Video analysis

• Wearable sensor data (where permitted)

Which teams are known for heavy AI and analytics use?

While all 30 clubs have analytics departments, several organizations are widely regarded as leaders:

• Los Angeles Dodgers

• Tampa Bay Rays

• Houston Astros

• Cleveland Guardians

• New York Yankees

• Boston Red Sox

These clubs invest heavily in data science, software engineering, biomechanics, and quantitative research.

One important point is that baseball decisions are rarely made by AI alone. Front offices typically combine AI-generated insights with the judgment of scouts, coaches, medical staff, and executives. AI can highlight patterns or probabilities that humans might miss, but personnel decisions, game strategy, and player development still rely heavily on human expertise.

In many ways, MLB is among the most data-driven professional sports, making it one of the earliest and most extensive adopters of AI-assisted decision-making.

Happy news. The Yankees will tap funds from an investor long linked to Jeffrey Epstein

Nothing beats replacing baseball banter with news about money. I can't get enough! And yesterday, the House of Steinbrenner offered up some prime, chewable, financial crapola: 

The Yankees will soon secure $3 billion from Apollo Global Management Inc., the giant corporate asset squid, which has about $840 billion sunken into everything from hedge funds to designer dildos. (Actually, not sure about the dildos, but I felt this post could use an extra spank of alliteration.) 

Apollo was founded in 1990 by Leon Black, an all-star from the ongoing Jeffrey Epstein tomfoolery. Black resigned from Apollo in 2021, so Apollo's pristine rep would not be dragged through the leach field of public attention. According to that beacon of muck-rakery, Wikipedia... 

Between 2012 and 2017, Black paid Epstein a total of $170 million for "tax and financial services" that reportedly saved him over $1 billion in taxes. After Black had a long-term affair with a Russian model, she threatened to make public allegations of sexual abuse unless he paid her $100 million. Epstein negotiated a 2015 NDA under which Black agreed to pay her $100,000 per month over 15 years, totalling $18 million. In 2024, Black said that he "deeply regrets" his relationship with Epstein.

Uh huh. Yeahp. Whatever. 

Somehow, it always boils down to an old creep chasing sex. Am I right? 

Of course, Hal Steinbrener is just chasing a RH-hitting catcher. 

Listen... I hate to taint this blog with non-baseball chatter. But now and then, it's worth remembering, as Charles Bukowski wrote, "Sometimes you've got to kill 4 or 5 thousand men before you somehow get to believe that the sparrow is immortal, money is piss and that you have been wasting your time."

Now and then, it's worth noting that, throughout human history, the soul-less fucks who sit atop the shit pile of civilization think nothing of washing their hands with money and blood. But the stink never leaves. Here at IT IS HIGH, we want to think of the Yankees as a team of players led by a heroic captain and an ace pitcher deep into his twilight years. What they are is a massive investment cockroach whose tentacles manage to caress every evil in the universe.

But for now, let's close our eyes and hope that the extra $3 billion frees up a catcher and some bullpen fodder. 

I prefer to think of Hal as a guy who would be happier running a baseball card store in downtown Utica. He was born into gold and knows nothing else. He will never understand what it's like to owe money to an algorithm. But he'll never escape that stank. 

The Dodgers are coming. The Dodgers are coming. Everyone, hide. The Dodgers are coming.

 

By now, you surely know that the mighty Dodgers - aka the new Yankees - will appear Friday in NYC - the new home of the Knicks - to play the Yankees, who are the current Washington Generals. 

They'll feature the great Shohei Ohtani, the modern Babe Ruth, though he'll miss a matchup with Aaron Judge, the new Giancarlo. The Yankee captain will spend Friday getting MRIs - the new X-rays - of his fractured rib, the new torn hammy. 

Pitching will be Yoshi Yamamoto, the new Pedro, against Cam Schlittler, the new Gerrit Cole, (unless the old Gerrit Cole returns.) 

Yankee manager Aaron Boone, the new Gene Mauch, will send out Ben Rice, the new Tino, and Jazz Chisholm, the next Juan Sojo - that is, unless 2027 becomes the new 1994. If that happens, Rob Manfred becomes the new Nero, and baseball becomes the new Edmund Fitzgerald. 

Either way, over this all-star break - the new era of soccer - the world is changing. Travis & Tay are the new Joe & Marilyn, Netflix is the new Standard Oil, Elon Musk is the new Cornelius Vanderbilt, and Mitch McConnell is the new asparagus. Truth is the new lie, war is the new peace, and we are the new barbarians. 

Friday, it's the Dodgers. The new season begins.

Before we celebrate Hunter Dietz, this year's Yankee top pick, let us ponder the whereabouts of Dax Kilby

Last weekend, the Yankees selected Hunter Dietz - a giant lefty stalk of Arkansas asparagus - in the MLB draft, and immediately booted up the YES crapola machine. "We're ecstatic!" gushed Damon Openheimer the Yankees' Vice President of the atom bomb  lost youth domestic amateur scouting, over Dietz, the 35th pick of the draft. According to various Mel Kipers and Booger MacFarlands, Dietz ranked 17th in the overall MLB draft class. Thus, a steal! Right? 

Listen: I aint lookin' for no trouble, okay? The Yankees chose - and quickly signed - a 21-year-old, legit sandwich-round stallion, big as a bus - (6'6", 235) - and who already has had elbow surgery (stress fracture, 2024). It's not like he suffered an aortic dissection. But the Yankees say he might not throw a pitch this summer, so tender are the tendons that separate an Andy Pettitte from an Andrew Brackman. Deitz could be a factor late next year, assuming there is a 2027 season. 

Immediately, Deitz becomes one of the Yankees top-ranked prospects - maybe even No 1. That would mean supplanting last year's purveyor of Oppenheimian ecstasy, the 6'2" (Jeter-sized) SS, Dax Kilby. 

Last year, Kilby - like Dietz, a sandwich-rounder- became the breakout sensation of the Yankee draft.  

At Single A Tampa, "Killer" Kilby - age 18, and with an unforgettable name - hit .353 over 19 games and 81 at-bats. (No HR, though.) In most prospect rating pools, he vaulted into the top three. In a few, he even topped George Lombard Jr., the reigning Yankee hope.

Unfortunately, 2026 has not been kind.

Kilby tweaked a hammy in spring training and missed three months. Then, on May 28, in a Florida rookie league, Kilby came to bat twice, went 0-2, and re-tweaked himself. He remains at large. Look for him on the milk cartons. 

We hope to see Kilby soon - at least a photograph, smiling like happy toddler Mitch McConnell, with yesterday's sports section. Proof of life! Check! Because following Yankee prospects - especially this time of year - is a zero sum game. For every Ben Rice and Cam Schlittler, a dozen lost souls disappear. Who knows the future of Spencer Jones? Not even Cashman, I suspect. But don't bet the Polymarket  on Jones playing CF for the Yankees again. 

In this millennium, the Yankees long ago ruined what used to be one of the most enjoyable aspects of rooting for this team: following kids in the minors. (One of them actually grew up to be Aaron Judge; can you believe it?) Meanwhile, our arch-rivals - Boston, Tampa, Toronto, Baltimore, the Mets - have chosen to build with youth.  

Obviously, it doesn't always work. But inevitably, the Yankees pay a price for treating the next generation like a 5-cent bottle deposit. Three weeks ago, in fearful Fenway, the Redsocks ate our Lunchables. Ever since, Cooperstown Cashman has been trolling for trade fodder. Let's just hope it doesn't mean the forever disappearance of Dax the Max. Yeesh. Oppenheimer barely got to know him. 

96 down, 66 to go

 

Corey Seagar?

Lombard, Jr.?

Shelly Duncan?

Jeremy Pena?

Ryan Jeffers?

Hunter Goodman?

Higgy?

Skubal? (Surely you jest)

It's a long season. Given Cashman's track record, it's about to get a lot longer.

At the break, this we know about the 2026 Yankees.

 

1. The Yankees are Ben Rice's team. When he slumps, they lose. When he hits, they win. 

2. Upcoming scans on Aaron Judge's rib will dictate the entire Yankee trade deadline strategy.

3. Jasson Dominguez shows flashes of talent but does not look like a budding superstar. 

4. Spencer Jones will be traded at the deadline.

5. The Yankees are ready to move on from Anthony Volpe. 

6. Barring an injury or deep slump at Scranton, George Lombard Jr. will be our SS in September.

7. After Tampa, Boston is the team to fear.

8. Giancarlo Stanton is a complete non-factor. There is no reason to expect him back. Ever.

9. Throughout history, every great Yankee team had a great catcher. They currently have one of the worst in baseball.

10. The Yankees have so many needs - and so few trade chips - that Brian Cashman will not bother to chase a 3B at the deadline.

11. The Yankees have once again been handed the keys to NYC this fall, because the Mets are a complete bust.