In magnificent act of charity, AJ Burnett saves Yankees from second round of Bobby Abreu

"The end of time will be marked

by acts of unfathomable compassion."

- Fyodor Dostoevsky -

In the end, let it be known that the man called AJ Burnett - who last year rendered unto Yankeedom 190 innings - forgave us for betraying Jesus Montero, forgave us for embracing the delusion that Freddy Garcia has another year, forgave us for putting paper money ahead of winning the World Series.

Yesterday, in an act of self-sacrifice worthy of a cable makeover show, Burnett canceled a disasterous Yankee trade to the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim of Los Angeles-Anaheim Angels, which would have plunged his old teammates back into the stygian bleakness of 2007 -- returning Bobby Abreu to New York in a summer when Pink Floyd has been booked to bring "The Wall" to Yankee Stadium.

Our response to this magnificent act? We will deal Burnett to Pittsburgh, or Cleveland, or North Korea, or anywhere that Brian Cashman won't have to notice him outperform the new crop of pet pitchers we will keep - having traded him merely to save the billionaire owners a few extra scraps of blood money. 

The Gammonites say today or tomorrow, the Yankees will announce the deal. They will rejoice over some 26-year-old outfield lugnut, and they will say this now gives us wriggle-room to sign Raul Obanez - (sarcasm alert:) lifting the hearts of Yankee fans everywhere.

But the actual deal was made two months ago: We signed Freddy Garcia for $4 million. Nothing against Freddy - he pitched well for us last year - but do we really think he's a better shot for 2012 than Burnett?

At least we were spared Abreu II. Thanks to you know who.