Friday, June 21, 2013

The critics are raving about this exciting Yankee ballclub!

The verdicts are coming in. This plucky Yankee ball club is making a name for itself!


New York Times: "... stagnant and inefficient... By the time the Yankees came to bat in the eighth inning, only a small fraction of the announced crowd of 37,649 remained..."

ESPN: "... scary bad... anemic... Bronx Bombers -- and we use that term loosely..."

Daily News: "... the AL East basement is looking pretty big in the window..."

Joel Sherman: "... deploying lineups that would shame Scranton Wilkes-Barre..." 

River Ave: "... didn’t put up much of a fight... completely overmatched... ridiculousness..." 

John Sterling: "... really needs the return of its captain...  A-Rod, too...."

IT IS HIGH: "... This is World War Y...  Shoot them, chop up the bodies, burn the corpses, bury the ashes, and explode a nuclear bomb over the grave... If this virus spreads, we're all dead..."

8 comments:

JM said...

Speaking of Gene Shalit, did you know Rex Reed is still writing movie reviews? For the New York Observer. Of course, they're reviews as written by a 90 year old gay man who is more conservative than, well, the New York Observer, but the guy is still doing it. He doesn't get anything he sees, it's kind of embarrassing, but what the heck.

Brian Cashman, General Manager of the 27-time World Champion New York Yankees (and hunk o' burnin' love) said...

Hey, John, can this Rex Reed guy play third base? Please let me know immediately.

Gene Shalit 2B said...

Thanks for publishing my picture, Duque. Just to remind your readers, I batted .266 that season for the Mets. Not quite David Wright, but respectable nonetheless.

KD said...

The banality of this team is catching. Don't cry to me about the injuries. Injuries don't explain Robbie turning doubles into singles. Hey Yankee FO! Where's OUR Puig??? To HELL with your scrap heap philosophy!!

Anonymous said...

Sarcasm S popular in the Big Apple as the Coney Dog
And shock radio!

Anonymous said...

Puig will self distruct as his career progresses
Gene looks like a combo of Ed Kranepool, Keith Hernandez and tommy Chong

joe de pastry said...

Anybody still think we're better off than we'd be with a healthy Tex and Grandy, not to mention Swisher and Martin?

Leinstery said...

Everyone: "We need the captain back so John can finally stop drinking himself to death"