Wednesday, November 23, 2022

On this holiday weekend, Yankee fans must start bracing themselves for The Worst

Let me begin by stating - unequivocally - that I will not live long enough to see Aaron Judge as a Giant, or a Dodger, or whatever, without doubling over from heartache. If he leaves, I will never get over it. Never...

Today, we must start steeling ourselves for the worst.

It could happen this weekend. The SF Giants could put numbers on the table that so dwarf the Yankees' offer that, coupled with the lingering family emotions of Thanksgiving, Judge could decide to scuttle his free agent money tour and simply return home to Northern California. 

If that happens, who are we to judge

We will transverse the Kubler/Ross/Cashman Scale of Yankee Grief. 

1. Denial. We may already be here. We believe Hal Steinbrenner's gobble-gobble about how much he wants Judge to stay a Yankee. We tell ourselves, there is no way Judge would leave, no way Hal would let it happen, no way, impossible...  

2. Anger. We will rage about greedy players. Robbie Cano! The living gall! We will fume about Cano's irrelevant career. We will rant about how Judge failed in this recent postseason, that we're better off with $40 million to spare, we will scream, we will rage...

3. Bargaining. We will note how Judge's contract, within three years, will be a lead-weighted albatross around the Giants' neck. We will throw ourselves into the debate over what free agents we should sign - Cody Bellinger? Justin Verlander? - like an NFL team with the first pick in the draft. We will tell ourselves that we dodged a bullet, another crushing contract, we're lucky, so lucky...  

4. Depression. This will hit next spring, when RF Aaron Hicks homers in the first grapefruit league game, and the Gammonites say he looks ready for a big comeback season... this will be the worst part... 

5. Acceptance. At some point, maybe a long way off, will realize that Aaron Fucking Judge gave us the greatest year in modern baseball history, and that - no matter where he plays, or how much it hurts - No. 99 must never again be worn by a Yankee. 

It cannot go to The Martian or that giant OF we drafted this summer, Spencer Jones. It would crush mere mortals. It belongs for the ages. It must be retired, and we will smile with tears in our eyes, remembering a great Yankee. 

But we will never be over it. No, sir. That will never happen...

15 comments:

gc said...

#3

The Archangel said...

Part of me wants to see him go to watch the Yankeedom meltdown.
I, strangely, revel in other people's sports misery. You know, cuz, it not real misery, like going through chemo, but fan misery.

I will also enjoy the meltdown 4-5 years from now when his contract becomes an albatross to whomever he signs with.

I must take my pleasure where I can since the Yanks will not win another WS in my lifetime.
Hey, there's always MilanAC

Mildred Lopez said...


@AA...

I will root against MilanAC for the rest of my life and beyond, if there's a beyond, even though I know nothing about them and nothing about soccer in general, and I would root hard against the Yankees if I hadn't been destined since birth to be a Yankees fan. Sadly that's the level of my disdain for all things Fiscal Hal and his sock puppet Cashman.

Carl J. Weitz said...

If Hal lets Judge walk, with the money saved, perhaps he will instruct the concession stands to pour stronger mixed drinks next year.

Doug K. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Doug K. said...

Speaking of mixed drinks...

Here's one to add to my Holiday Drinks post from yesterday.


The Aaron Judge Wine Spritzer

One Glass La Jota Vineyards, Cabernet Franc, Howell Mountain, Napa Valley

Seltzer

How to make it:

1) Tell people that you are just going to Napa Valley to pick up a case of the above and a pack of cigarettes.

2) Never come back.

Joe Formerlyof Brooklyn said...


Here's some of what you know if you are Aaron Judge (the result of a Vulcan Mind-Meld) --

1. The NYYs batting coach(es) are worthless. You've got your own guy.

2. The team has loyalty to the wrong peeps. Miggy never got a 2nd chance. Aaron Hicks is a millstone. Donaldson is a catastrophe. And don't forget Chapman!

3. Yankee trade calls are wildly horrible. AJ might personally like Giancarlo, but he knows the trade for him was ridiculous. Cole is on his way to becoming another disaster. What light does that shed on 2023 and later "deals" by the "braintrust"....?

4. The Yankees last won a World Series in 2009. The Giants won in 2010-12-14. The recent record for the Giants isn't spectacular, but....

5. Future talent is going to be traded away. Judge watched Sears. He saw Monty in action. Those guys were sent packing in exchange for not very much.

I'm sure Judge knows a lot of other things that we all can't access. He probably has an opinion of Lorna Boone that's not all that different from what we all think here. Perhaps he secretly relishes putting in another X number of years in pinstripes, with a space reserved for him near Mickey's monument.

BUT: If he wants to win a World Series, he might very well be SURE that signing with the NYYs is going to turn him into a very frustrated guy.

Then again, maybe he cares very little about winning a W.S., so if Hal comes up with an extra $10-$20 million (vs the best bid from elsewhere) -- maybe he'll stay here.

My guess: If the money elsewhere is even close to comparable, he's gonna walk.

HoraceClarke66 said...

Pretty funny, Doug! And I agree in general, guys.

I thought originally that he would end up staying, because the Yanks would realize they would have to do whatever it takes. But even if he's only out in SF as a bargaining ploy, it shows that the Yanks are still playing "hardball."

Ugh.

Doug K. said...

Hoss,

It may come down to Thanksgiving Dinner at his In-Laws. At the end he might think it would be nice to play near his children's future grandparents, surrounded by family and friends...

Or

If it's like most family meals, he would barely be through the soup course before thinking, "I've. Got. To. Get. Out. Of. Here.

13bit said...

My denial broke years ago. You can track its progress in my posts here, as I slowly became a nihilistic, broken Yankee fan. My inner child was murdered by Brian Cashman.

I'll be angry at them forever. That switch was also broken.

Bargaining? What's the point? We're all going to die and the Yankees are going to keep losing as long as we have Brian and Hal.

Depression? I've spilled more depression over these guys than you have ever drunk. Let me tell YOU about Yankee-induced depression.

Acceptance? Well, only if you agree with Janis that "freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose."

Let me repeat: BRIAN CASHMAN KILLED MY INNER CHILD.

How does that rank on the Hague's list of horrors? Pretty, pretty pretty high, if you ask me. That's something that you can never get back. Now, I'm just a broken old Yankee fan who has no hope.

edb said...

Duque:
You will get past it. Put Doofus Hal and his Genius C ashman will make excuses regarding how they did everything to sign Judge. When Stanton goes down, they will have some stiff the Genius picked up playing right field, as Bi G will start in Right Field. The Yankees may be a lower Wild Card and be ousted in the first round. Fourteen years without a World Series appearance.

AboveAverage said...

why is it that no one here has picked up on THIS:

https://www.nj.com/yankees/2022/11/aaron-judge-makes-peoples-sexiest-man-alive-list.html

(forgive me if its already been written about - but I've been a bit bizzy, bizzy, bizzy)

BTR999 said...

No comment until the time limit is up.

DickAllen said...


I don't think Judge will base his decision on money. What I will be curious about, no matter where he signs, is his reasoning. I mean, when you're up in this stratosphere of 30-40MM, a few dollars here or there isn't going to make that much of a difference to him.

So, what is going to tip the scales for him, and what will the deal look like? Watching him chase Maris all year, with the composure he's shown - never too high or too low - I think he'll base his decision on what feels comfortable for him long term. Family or money?

I say he chooses family. And California. And the losers (all three of them) will trot out all the usual tropes about how "...we made what we thought was a legitimate offer..."

Then we can all sit back and root for the demise of the franchise we've all been praying for, starting with The Intern and ending with Booooooone. Cause we know Harold isn't going anywhere.

Kevin said...

As Doug K wrote, our best chance is dinner with the in-laws. If he does go, and we don't like what Hal does in response, we can do one thing. LEAVE. I'm not signed on to any team, I've gotten over that idea as I've gotten older. I can become a Giants fan, and "follow" the Yankees and jump back on if they pull it together. I never would have thought about this option when I was twenty-five, but them days have blown away...